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Archive for the ‘Fred Colon’ Category

SOUNDTRACK: hiatus

[READ: April 2022] The Truth

This story is set in Ankh-Morpork but it’s not about the Watch.  Or Lord Vetenari.  Well, it sort of is about both of them, but not really.

This story is about The Truth.  And also about a new character called William de Worde.  William is a black sheep of a famous and wealthy Ankh-Morpork family.  He has always been interested in writing and in finding the truth.

His job was to write an occasional message to various important figures around the Disc with information about what’s going on in Ankh-Morpork.  He quickly learned that he could write his message, have the Engraver’s guild print multiple copies and just change a few things for each one.  This made him a lot more money.

Then there was big news in Ankh-Morpork–the arrival of movable type from the dwarfs, particularly Gunilla Goodmountain.

William, through a series of events, inadvertently becomes the spokesperson for the movable type (even though he had nothing to do with it) and starts a newspaper. The paper is supposed to be named Ankh-Morpork Items but they get the type wrong and it became The Ankh-Morpork Times.

He is assisted by the dwarfs and Sacharissa Cripslock–a fiery reporter who proves very useful. (more…)

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SOUNDTRACK: hiatus

[READ: April 2022] The Fifth Elephant

This is a story of Ankh-Morpork and progress.  Ankh-Morpork has just introduced a series of clacks–semaphore towers–to provide quick communication between distant places.  It’s expensive, but businesses in the know are all getting c-mail addresses.

Incidentally, the movie The Fifth Element came out in 1997 and was clearly an inspiration for the title–although very little about that film falls into place here.  Rather, the fifth elephant of the title is believes to have been one of the elephants who held up the world but who fell to the Disc and caused craters of fat deposits that are found underground in Uberwald (which produces the best fat on the disc).  Fat deposits are a very valuable commodity.

Uberwald factors heavily in this story.  Ankh-Morpork now has the largest dwarf city on the Disc.  And the progressive dwarfs in Ankh-Morpork are able to sway elections back home–where the more traditional dwarfs (deep down dwarfs) don’t think highly of the dwarfs who have left.

An upcoming election for Dwarf king was swayed by the Ankh-Morpork contingent and Rhys Rhysson, a progressive dwarf is set to become King.  But this has made many old school dwarfs very unhappy and rumors of an internal war start brewing. (more…)

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SOUNDTRACK: hiatus

[READ: March 2022] Jingo

With a title like Jingo, you know that Terry Pratchett isn’t holding back.  And indeed, this is a story about two countries fighting each other over disputed territory–and the unenlightened attitudes that people have about “foreigners.”

What is great about Pratchett is how much he is able to get his point across without being preachy.  Some of the unenlightened characters say offensive things, but they are quickly discoruaged from such attitudes–not with bludgeoning and hysteria, but with rational comments.  It’s very well done.

But what causes this trouble?  Well, out of nowhere, an island has surfaced.  The island of Leshp was submerged forever, and suddenly, it floated to the surface amid two fishermen.  Solid Jackson of Ankh-Morpork (and his long-suffering son) and Greasy Arif from Al-Khali, the Klatchian capital.  They often fought over their prey (the Curious Squid), because they sailed the same waters that were between the two countries.

While this is going on, diplomatic business is occurring in Ankh-Morpork.  The prince of Klatch, Khufurah, is in Ankh-Morpork to receive an honorary degree (Doctorum Adamus cum Flabello Dulci) in Sweet Fanny Adams.

Hostilities between A-M and Klatch are high.

Several leaders of the city are there to complain to Lord Vetenari about Klatch.  Watch Captain Sam Vimes is there to add a level head and sarcasm.  When someone complains that Klatch wouldn’t accept ten boatloads of cabbages, Vimes says out loud to himself “everyone knows caterpillars add to the flavor” and later “Meat is at its best when it’s going green.”

And of course, the Patrician knows his way around diplomacy: “it is no longer considered…nice…to send a warship … to show Johnny Foreigner the error of his ways.”

Later, the Prince meets with Vimes and asks him about the word he’s heard shouted at him: “towelhead.” (more…)

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SOUNDTRACK: hiatus

[READ: January 2022] Feet of Clay

The Watch is back.  This story doesn’t exactly introduce Golems to the city of Ankh-Morpork.  They’ve always been there.  But this is the first time they have become a big deal.

Also a big deal? Sam Vimes.  Now that Vimes has become a Lord, it’s about time he gets a crest.  So he goes to the local keeper of the Register of Proper People: Dragon King of Arms, to see about his old family crest.

Except, as Dragon King of Arms is quick to point out, his ancestor was a regicide and they tend to frown on that sort of thing.  So it turns out that one of Vimes ancestor’s

But while Vimes is denied a crest, he is informed that his co-worker, Nobby Nobbs is actually from a learned and proper family (but Nobby is barely human!), still, there is fanciness in his blood.  He is descended from the Earl of Ankh.

Nobby is not too happy about being upper crust and spends much of the book bemoaning that he can be upper class and have no money.  When Society calls on him to come visit, he is woefully out of place and the whole dinner party is a hilarious feast for the reader. (more…)

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SOUNDTRACK: hiatus

[READ: Fall 2021] Men at Arms

The Watch is back and it’s getting bigger.

And they are going to have to deal with another person who is trying to oust Patrician Vetinari.  This time the person in question is Edward D’eath a high ranking member of the Assassins Guild. D’eath has been doing genealogical research and he believes that Corporal Carrot might be the rightful heir to the throne of Ankh-Morpork–the throne which even Lord Vetinari won’t sit on (but won’t remove either).

Meanwhile, Captain Sam Vimes is about to be married to Lady Sybil Ramkin (I can’t believe that the Vimes /Lady Sybil relationship was settled after just one book!)

Sam is delighted with Sybil, but he hates just about everything else about the upcoming marriage.  He hates that Sybil is one of the richest women in Ankh-Morpork.  He hates hobnobbing with the other rich people in the city (Sybil is really very different from everyone else, which is why he loves her). He is even rather uncomfortable with just how rich Sybil is.  There’s a very spot-on argument about how rich people even save money when they buy expensive things.  For instance, the average cop can’t afford to buy expensive shoes that last.  So instead he has to buy cheap shoed that wear out quickly.  Then he has to buy another pair.  And then another pair.  Three $20 pairs that don’t last as long as one $50 pair.

The worst thing for Sam is that he really doesn’t want to give up being a cop.  Well, maybe he kind of does, but it’s all he knows.  And he knows that he’ll miss it.  Even if things are changing around him. (more…)

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SOUNDTRACK: hiatus

[READ: September 2021] Guards! Guards!

This was the first Discworld book that I felt like I really remembered things from it.  Did I ever even read the other books?  I have no idea now.

Every thing about Captain Vimes was familiar (although I didn’t remember details).  But I was really surprised to discover that his relationship with Lady Sybil Ramkin started in his first book.  It’s also the introduction of Corporal Carrot.  I was really surprised that all of these important events happened in this first book about the Watch.

This book is one of many in which a plot to overthrow Lord Vetinari is paramount to the action.  The Unique and Supreme Lodge of the Elucidated Brethren of the Ebon Night want to institute a puppet king in place of Lord Vetinari.  The Brotherhood is a hilariously bumbling group all bent on secret signs and meanings.  But the head of the Brotherhood (lupine Wonse) is quite serious.  And he has taken a book from the Library (The Librarian is going to be so mad) which shows him how to summon dragons.

Now dragons do exist on the Disc.  Indeed, Lady Sybil is the head of the swamp dragon rescue society (they’re not just for Christmas, they are for life).  But swamp dragons are tiny and cute(ish) and harmless(ish).  And the dragon that the Brotherhood has summoned is a massive beast that is capable of burning down a building (before it even gets strong).

But what does the dragon have to do with anything?  Well, the Brotherhood has a puppet king in mind, a guy who can come in and “slay” their dragon just like a king.

But the guards of the title are aware that something is not right in Ankh-Morpork.  Well, nothing is every right in Ankh-Morpork, but this wrongness is different. (more…)

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