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Archive for the ‘Yuck!’ Category

SOUNDTRACK:

[READ: December 20, 2024] “The Things Eric Eats Before He Eats Himself”

This year my wife ordered me The Short Story Advent Calendar.  This is my seventh time reading the Calendar–it’s a holiday tradition!  Here’s what H&O says about the calendar this year.

Ten years of stories! Yikes, where does the time go?
When the first Short Story Advent Calendar launched, in 2015, we frankly had no clue we’d still be sitting here today, continuing to offer up batches of tasty stories fresh from the oven. To celebrate this milestone, we’ve packed the 10th SSAC with a mix of new and familiar names—ideal company for those chilly winter nights ahead.

The author of this story was Carmen Maria Machado.  Each day has an online component with the author with a brief interview.  This one begins with this blurb:

It’s December 20. Carmen Maria Machado, author of In the Dream House, doesn’t engage with Craigslist for this very reason.

This story’s odd title is in fact very literal. (more…)

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SOUNDTRACK:

[READ: December 11, 2024] “Children of a Careless God”

This year my wife ordered me The Short Story Advent Calendar.  This is my seventh time reading the Calendar–it’s a holiday tradition!  Here’s what H&O says about the calendar this year.

Ten years of stories! Yikes, where does the time go?
When the first Short Story Advent Calendar launched, in 2015, we frankly had no clue we’d still be sitting here today, continuing to offer up batches of tasty stories fresh from the oven. To celebrate this milestone, we’ve packed the 10th SSAC with a mix of new and familiar names—ideal company for those chilly winter nights ahead.

The author of this story was Elizabeth Gonzales James.  Each day has an online component with the author with a brief interview.  And this one opens:

It’s December 11. Elizabeth Gonzales James, author of Mona at Sea, could have sworn there were more fish in that aquarium a minute ago.

This was a disturbing story. (more…)

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SOUNDTRACK: hiatus

[READ: February 4, 2024] “A Case of Identity”

Many years ago I was on a bit of a Sherlock Holmes kick.  I read the first two novels and then couldn’t get a copy of this collection, so I guess I forgot about the detective.  Since i have recently listened to a couple of Sherlock Holmesian books I decided to track down the next book to read.

And I was quite surprised to realize that while Arthur Conan Doyle did write a lot of Sherlock stories, most of them were short stories, not novels (See the list below).

So since these were short stories I decided to give a crack at them.

This second story in the book is remarkably… inconsequential?  Holmes has a habit of saying that big mysteries often disguise simple crimes–if it’s a huge deal, then the plotting must be simple.  He also likes that life is far ore bizarre than fiction (amusing in a short story).  But even by those standards, this is a pretty small story.  It also feels not very hard to figure out–I have also realized that much of Holmes’ success comes from not letting on some things that he has figured out (thereby not letting the readers in on it either).

So Mary Sutherland has come to see Holmes about a personal matter.  There is some excellent moments of Holmes reading the woman from outside and telling what her concern is just by the way she is standing.  I also realized that so many of the story really do depend on British mannerisms and behaviors–things that wouldn’t come across as well today.  Like cuffs being mended and ink stains on fingers.

At any rate, Holmes figures she has a story of woe about a romance.  And so she does. (more…)

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[LISTENED TO: June 2023] All the Beautiful Lies

I loved Swanson’s Eight Perfect Murders.  I hated the characters in The Kind Worth Killing (but I loved the twists).  So I had this third book as a kind of final litmus test for if I would listen to anymore books by him.

And the answer is no.

Once again, Swanson’s twist and surprises (and the ending) are really good.  But if possible, he made main characters who are even more horrible and unlikable.  How was that possible?

There’s a few spoilers in this review, although none that reveal the twists or who the murderer(s) is/are.

I’m just going to get this over with, so yes, there’s a spoiler here.  One of the main characters is a pedophile.

It’s bad enough when, at some point in the middle of the book, we learn that he is happily going to essentially make a new life with the daughter of his second wife (step-daughter, so not incest, but Jesus Fucking Christ).  And then we find out that this guy was introduced to sex when he was a teenager by a bored housewife.  So he is basically “paying it forward.”

How did Swanson even write these words?   How did his moral compass allow these words to pass his fingers onto the page?

I mean, the blurb on Goodreads starts with this:

Harry Ackerson has always considered his stepmother Alice to be sexy and beautiful, in an “otherworldly” way. She has always been kind and attentive, if a little aloof in the last few years.

I mean, who reads that blurb and wants to read more (I go into my books totally blind, so I had no idea this was coming). (more…)

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SOUNDTRACK: hiatus.

[READ: May 9, 2023] Silk Hills

I haven’t been reading that many graphic novels lately.  My daughter made the excellent point that our local library has an excellent graphic novel collection but that it hasn’t been updated in quite a while.  So I was pleased t o see this book at work, especially since it was from Oni Press, a reliably weird publisher.

I don’t know any of the contributors: authors Brian Level (has written for Star Wars and Marvel) and Ryan Ferrier (has written lots of indie books and written for Marvel and DC).  Crank! is Christopher Crank who has done lettering for just about everyone.  Kate Sherron has a very distinctive visual style (which I see a lot of people don’t like).  I thought it was pretty cool and unusual–it reminded me a bit of Jeff Lemire’s style.

I have been listening to a book of short stories from The X-Files, and this book immediately made me think of the X-Files.  It’s also the kind of story that either should have been longer or should have had fewer hallucinatory passages and had more explanatory pages.

Beth Wills is a former Marine turned private investigator.  She lives in New York City but is sent to an unnamed rural community called Silk Hills.  It must be pretty far, as a gas station attendant remarks on her New York plates, but we don’t know exactly where Silk Hills is.

I enjoyed the interactions with Wills and the gas station attendant also a former military man (out six years). (more…)

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[READ: January 20, 2023] Doctors & Nurses 

When I requested Sweet Desserts, I also requested Doctors & Nurses. I didn’t know the order of her books, I just picked the two that were the first ones on the list.

Doctors & Nurses is similar to Sweet Desserts in that it is short (although it is actually 50 pages longer) and has short chapters.  But otherwise it is very different.  Desserts was a fairly serious book about two sisters (and a lot of sex).  This book is a farcial romp (with a lot of sex).

Comments online said the cover looked like a chick lit book, but it looks to me more like a cartoon from Playboy from the 1970s.

And it kind of reads like that too.

While Sweet Desserts bounced back and forth between past and present and the focus shifted between the main character and her sister, this story focuses pretty squarely on Jen, a fat nurse who is misanthropic and really seems to hate everyone.

There is one notable and peculiar thing about this book that is never addressed nor explained.  Every pages has SEVERAL words that are written in all capital LETTERS for, and I’m not trying to be obtuse about this, no reason that I can READILY determine.  I admit that I didn’t put a lot of TIME into trying to figure it out, BUT it is very peculiar.

The book opens with a scene of a rock and a gorge and the rock perpetually invading the gorge’s precious space.  It’s remarkably graphic sexually, as far as a rock and a gorge can have sex that is.

But that has nothing to do with the rest of the story (until the every end) which is about a nurse named Jen.  Jen is angry most of the time (the list of thing she hates is extensive).  And the tone is set pretty early. (more…)

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SOUNDTRACK: FLEETWOOD MAC-“The Green Manalishi (With the Two Pronged Crown)” (1969).

I know this song from Judas Priest, who made a killer cover that they played for years.  Rob Halford’s voice on the song (in their live version from 1976) is incredible.

I didn’t even know there was an “original” until a decade or so ago.  It seemed out of character that Judas Priest would cover a trippy Fleetwood Mac song (of course they also covered Joan Baez, so…).  But wow, this song is a trip.

I mean, the lyrics alone are the stuff of legend at this point.  There’s dozens of places where you can read about the song.  Here’s a few paragraphs from Uncle Stylus.

Peter Green said it’s a song about the corrupting influence of money, which he equated with the devil. In 1969, the huge success of Fleetwood Mac had brought them a considerable income and Green had agreed with the band that they would would give it all to charity. One can imagine that “morning after” moment when he demanded they made good on their idealistic rush of blood. A massive quarrel ensued, and Green never forgave the other bandmembers for reneging on the idea and claimed that this was what inspired the song.

Manalishi is a word that Peter Green made up for the song. The sound of it rolling around the tongue is exotic and menacing, suffused with the mystery of demons and gremlins from a medieval Italian dark night.

Listening now it’s clear that he was really, whether consciously or unconsciously, telling us about his depressive schizophrenia and even the dark persona unleashed within him when he took certain drugs, the “green” of the manalishi being Green himself. It reads like the beginning of a story by Edgar Allan Poe.

The Judas Priest cover doesn’t really follow the original all that much (the ending wailing is so much cooler the way Halford does it).  But the riff here is pretty spectacular (understandable why they’d want to cover it).  Also, it was a big hit in England when it came out, so it’s not like the band was crate-digging for rarities.  I had just never heard of it.

There is something some sinister about the slow menace of the Fleetwood Mac version.  It’s incredible to think that this is the same band who put out Rumours (although really it isn’t, but whatever).

Check out the live from Boston version for some real heaviness.  And marvel that this weird song was a hit.

[READ: November 2022] Collectibles

Evidently Lawrence Block has created several of these anthologies all loosely based around a theme.  This is the first one I’ve read, although I see another one called Playing Games is on the horizon.

This collection is about collectibles.  Most but not all of the stories are crime or mystery based.  A couple have a touch of the supernatural as well.  The term “collectible” is pretty broadly defined from one story to the next, but it’s a decent prompt to let you know what you’re getting.

Lawrence Block – The Elephant in the Living Room (An Introduction)
This is an essay about the book which includes an amusing story about Lawrence’s Uncle Jerry who ha a collection of giraffes.  There were presently none in the collection because he hadn’t found one up to his standards. (more…)

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SOUNDTRACK: hiatus

[READ: March 2022] Jailbroke

This was the third of three books by Asman that I received at work.  It was also the least enjoyable of the three.

The story is a simple one.  Set in the future when humans are not the greatest species on the planet (they go by Terrans now), a spaceship that is run primarily by AI is ferrying humans around.  Using Asimov’s first principal, the AI, who are now vastly smarter and more useful than thehumans, cannot harm the humans.  Their existence is predicated on the fact that are have to help the humans.

Until, that is, one of them is accidentally fed biofuel that has a human part in it.  This jailbreaks their programming and allows them to kill humans indiscriminately.

Since this is a spaceship (a bottle episode), there’s not a lot that can happen.

In Nunchuck City, Asman delighted in violence.  In this story, he delights in gore.  Like the way he describes in loving detail how the space drill works on someone’s skull. (more…)

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SOUNDTRACK: hiatus

[READ: February 15, 2022] City of Iron and Dust

Like a bird attracted to shiny things, when I see an interesting-looking book come by my desk at work, I decide to read it–no matter how big my tipping over pile of other books to read happens to be.

I dithered about reading this book and I had a slightly hard time getting into it (probably because I wasn’t exactly sure if I wanted to read it).  But it got very good and very exciting very quickly.

The book is broken up into chapters and each chapter is broken into subsections about a particular character

Jag.  She is the daughter of one of the big goblin families in the City of Iron.  But she longs for a world where goblins don’t dominate and persecute the rest of the fae.  She’s an idealist who goes to fae bars trying to feel something more than the money and power her family has.

Sil.  Sil is half goblin half Fae.  She is Jag’s half sister.  But she was brought up to be an assassin.  And her only purpose in life is to protect Jag.  Later on, we are shown the brutality she suffered to become such a formidable creature.  She has no opinions of her own. (more…)

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[READ: Summer 2021] The Southern Book Club’s Guide to Slaying Vampires

I loved the name of this book.  The fact that it was put out by Quirk Books was a major plus.

This book was read by Bahni Turpin and she was magnificent.  I was hooked right from the start.  I loved her Southern accents and the way she made each character unique and easily recognizable.

In the preface to the book, Hendrix explains that this novel is a kind of apology for his earlier novel My Best Friend’s Exorcism.   In that novel teenagers were the protagonists and parents were cast as trouble for them.  He felt the need to address the concerns of the parents this time around.

I love the way the characters clearly love their children but are also realistic about them:  “Being a teenager isn’t a number,” says Maryellen. “It’s the age when you stop liking them.”

The story opens in a hilarious way.

It’s 1988 and Grace Cavanaugh had started a book club,  She wanted all of the women in her circle to read the classics.  This month’s book was Cry, The Beloved Country.  Grace was the quintessential Southern woman.  Her house was perfect.  Her thick pile carpets were white and immaculate (the way she inwardly cringes as cheese straws land on the carpet is hilarious).  She did not allow for anything improper.  She expected people to do what was proper.  Like finish the book club book.

The story zooms in on Patricia Campbell.  She needed the book club,  But she did not read the book.

She was given twenty minutes to talk about the book.  And the way she tries to stretch it out is hilarious.  Eventually Grace calls her out on it.  And is very disappointed in her.  Soon enough, though, the other women reveal that they didn’t read it either.

On her way to her car Patricia is stopped by Kitty Scruggs, another book club woman.  She invites Patricia to join the book club that she has just started.  It’s going to be her and Slick Paley, a conservative Christian (with an amazing accent, thank you Bahni) who seems dumb but is far from dumb, and Maryellen, a Yankee transplant (who has a very different accent which is nice to hear).  Eventually, even Grace joins because they are going to be reading the most salacious true crime books they can find.

Each of the women is married and their families are very different.  Patricia’s husband is straight-laced.  Her daughter is just old enough to be sarcastic to her and her son, Blue (that name is explained about 3/4 of the way through the book) has suddenly become obsessed with Nazis.  Basically, she needs these women.

Five years later, the book club is still going and the women feel closer to each other than ever (although Patricia doesn’t feel super close to Grace, because who could, really).  Then one night, a night that Blue didn’t take out the garbage, Patricia walks to where the cans are stored and is attacked.  The assailant is an old woman.  She acts crazy and even though Patricia knows her, she can’t talk sense into her. The old woman bites off part of her ear (which becomes quite a conversation piece, obviously). (more…)

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