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Archive for the ‘Funny (ha ha)’ Category

alsion1SOUNDTRACK: CHRISTINE LAVIN AND THE MISTLETONES-A Christmas / Kwanzaa / Solstice / Chanukah / Ramadan / Boxing Day Song” (2006).

lavinI’ve always liked Christine Lavin, but she has fallen off my radar in recent years.  I’m delighted that she’s still making cool (and funny) folk music. We quickly added this to our holiday playlist.

It’s an a Capella track done in a round.  It opens with Christine wishing everyone a Happy Christmas and a happy new year (to an original melody). And then a male voice wishes you a happy Kwannza, a hip hop happy Kwanzaa (if you celebrate Kwanzaa).  A third voice sings the same melody wishing happiness to all who celebrate Solstice.  A second male voice now wishes you a happy Chanukah.

Then, in perfect harmony, third female and then male voices throw in Ramadan and, amusingly, Boxing Day.  It’s a light-hearted take on multiculturalism, all wrapped up in a pretty melody.

[READ: January 1, 2013] Alison Dare: Little Miss Adventures

I recalled the Alison Dare comics from when I used to be an Oni Press fanboy (I still love Oni Press but I can’t keep track of comics anymore).  Anyhow, Alison Dare is an all ages comic, so I brought a copy home for Clark from the library.  But he didn’t like it.  I wondered if it was because the main character was a girl, but i think it’s because the comic is black and white–he really only likes color comics.  Huh.  I also found that it may have been a little confusing for him–the writing was style was really engaging but not exactly straightforward.  Maybe in a year or so he’d enjoy it.

But I enjoyed it.

This book collects the first three Alison Dare stories: (more…)

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vordakSOUNDTRACK: TROUT FISHING IN AMERICA-“I Got a Cheese Log” (2004).

fishesWe bought the Trout Fishing in AMerica Christmas CD (Merry Fishes to All) this year. It arrived on the day before Christmas, so we didn’t get to listen to it too much).  But I rather enjoyed the nonsense of this song–everybody else got exactly what they wanted for Christmas but “I got a cheese log.”  It’s catchy (with piano, which is a bit unexpected for them) and the punchline of the chorus has a great wanh wanh sound.

But getting only a cheese log is enough to make anyone turn evil.

[READ: December 31, 2012] Vordak the Incomprehensible

Technically, according to the cover,  the author of this book is Vordak the Incomprehensible, but I’m going by the copyright page.

C.’s school had a Scholastic book fair.  I grabbed this book (with its large $2.50 sticker on the cover) figuring I could get him a surprise gift.  Of course, the people who work the Scholastic Book Fair seem to have no idea that one might be trying to surreptitiously buy a book for the child one is with–imbeciles!  brain-dead nincompoops!! (See the book is working, I feel more evil already).  Anyhow, since C. saw it, I told him that he could “buy” it for me for Christmas.  Which he rather liked.  And so, I read it on the last day of 2012 (making sure he saw me read it).

This book is very funny and a lot of fun.  I feel like it may be a year or two too old for him to really appreciate (like Wimpy Kid)–he would certainly laugh at most of the jokes, but I think it would be really really funny with a bit more, dare I say it, life experiences.

So the book is written by Vordak the Incomprehensible, an evil mastermind who is retiring.  He is passing along every thing he knows to you, the reader, despite his utter lack of faith in your abilities. (more…)

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12SOUNDTRACK: FRANK OCEAN-“Bad Religion” (2012).

frankoI didn’t know anything about Frank Ocean until I started looking at all of the  Best Albums of 2012 lists.  He was on everyone’s list and was pretty near the top of all of them.  So it was time to check him out.

It  turns out that he’s affiliated with the Odd Future collective, whom I’ve talked about in the past.  But he’s also been on a lot of big name records.  Channel Orange is his debut album (that’s not a mixtape) and the big surprise seems to be that this song (which he sang live on Jimmy Fallon) is about a male lover.  And I guess that’s progress.

So Ocean sings a slow R&B style, and I have to say his voice reminds me of Prince a lot.  Which is a good thing.  I really like this song.    It has gospelly keyboards (but in that Purple Rain kinda way).  And a really aching vocal line.  It’s really effective and it’s really simple.  And I think that’s what I liked best about this song and others that I’ve heard–he’s really understated.  Crazy, I know.

Now I do not like R&B, it’s one of the few genres that I just don;t get.  And yet there’s something about this album (the tracks I’ve listened to) that is really compelling.  It’s not awash in over the top R&B trappings, and it doesn’t try too hard.  It’s just Frank  (not his real name) and his voice over some simple beats.  A friend of mine recently said that all of a sudden she “got” this album, and  I think I may have to get it as well.

[READ: December 30, 2012] McSweeney’s #12

At the beginning of 2012, I said I’d read all of my old McSweeney’s issues this year.  I didn’t.  Indeed, I put it off for quite a while for no especial reason.  Now as the year draws to an end, I’m annoyed that I didn’t read them all, but it’s not like I read nothing.  Nevertheless, I managed to read a few in the last month and am delighted that I finished this one just under the wire.  For those keeping track, the only issues left are 13, 14, 15, 16, 20, 10, 38, (which I misplaced but have found again) and 42, which just arrived today.  My new plan in to have those first four read by Easter.  We’ll see.

So Issue #12 returns to a number of different fun ideas.  The cover:  It’s a paperback, but you can manipulate the front and back covers to make a very cool 3-D effect (by looking through two eyeholes) with a hippo.  The colophon/editor’s note is also back.  Someone had complained that he missed the small print ramble in the beginning of the book and so it is back, with the writer (Eggers? Horowitz?) sitting in Wales, in a B&B, and hating it.  It’s very funny and a welcome return.

As the title suggests, all of the stories here are from unpublished authors.  They debate about what exactly unpublished means, and come down on the side of not well known.  And so that’s what we have here, first time (for the mos part) stories.  And Roddy Doyle.

There are some other interesting things in this issue.  The pages come in four colors–each for a different section.  The Letters/Intro page [white], the main stories [pink], the Roddy Doyle piece (he’s not unpublished after all so he gets his own section) [gray] and the twenty minute stories [yellow].  There’s also photographs (with captions) of Yuri Gagarin.  And a series of drawing that introduce each story called “Dancewriting”–a stick figure on a five-lined staff.  They’re interesting but hard to fathom fully.

LETTERS (more…)

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greatSOUNDTRACK: PHINEAS AND FERB-“We Wish You a Merry Christmas” (2010).

pfholidayThis song takes the music of We Wish You a Merry Christmas and modifies it to fit the show.  Several characters get a verse, with my favorite coming from Isabella:

Oh, come tell me what’cha doin’ / All my relatives just flew in /From Mexico and Jerusalem / For the holidays
Both Christmas trees and menorahs / It can be confusing for us  / When we break into a chorus / Of “olé” (¡Olé!) and “oy vey” (¡Oy vey!)

Although I usually find Doofensmirtz’ lines to be the best, I don’t care for his verse–it is forced and not terribly funny.  But that is more than made up for with the end as it revisited the beloved figgy pudding:

All: We wish your every endeavor
Makes this the best Christmas ever
And we’re all so glad that we will never
Mention figgy pudding…

Dr. DoofenshmirtzOh, great. Well now we’ve mentioned it.
Major MonogramYou know, no one would have noticed if you’d have just kept your mouth shut.

We recently added the entire Phineas and Ferb Holiday Favorites album to our Christmas music collection.  Thanks, Swampy.

[READ: end of 2011-beginning of 2012] Great Expectations

I started this book over a year ago–Christmastime 2011 and I finished it in January of this year.  And I imagined writing a grand, eloquent post about the book, so I bided my time, and have now delayed for almost a year and have basically forgotten everything significant I thought about saying about it.  Never put anything off in the hopes that genius will strike.

So I read this book because my former coworker Stephanie talked about how much she liked it.  I had never read any Dickens before (possibly Tale of Two Cities but that would have been in High School and doesn’t count).  And Nick Hornby raves about Dickens in the pages of The Believer, so it seemed like a time to try him out.  Back when I was in college I joined a book club and received The Oxford Illustrated Dickens–30-some volumes of all of Dickens’ work in beautiful hardcover editions.  And I have lugged them with me to all my homes.  And now I have finally read one.

I was as surprised by how surprised I was by the story.  I knew the very basic outline and character names (thanks South Park), and from what I knew of Dickens, I thought I had the whole story figured out pretty early on.  But no, there was more afoot than I would have ever guessed.

So, the story: Phillip ‘Pip’ Pirrip is a blaksmith’s apprentice.  He was orphaned as a young babe and is currently living with his (terribly mean) older sister and her husband, a kindly blacksmith named Joe Gargery.  One dark and spooky night (as only existed in 19th century England), Pip is out in the swampy foggy graveyard visiting his parents’ graves when he hears a fight.  Two convicts have escaped from a prison ship and are fighting amidst the marshes.  The “winner,” spies Pip and threatens him–unless he brings a nail file and food, he will kill the young boy.  Pip is freaked and runs home to steal one of Joe’s files and a piece of pie that his sister has baked.  The next day the police capture the criminals, and the one whom Pip helped gives Pip a long look and says that he stole the pie, which lets Pip off the hook from his sister’s wrath.

Meanwhile, up the road a piece, there’s an old dilapidated house with an old dilapidated woman living in it.  She is Miss Havisham.  The delightful thing about Dickens is that Miss Havisham is crazily over the top and yet, because of the time it was written, she is totally believable.  (She may indeed have been based on someone Dickens knew).  No one like Miss Havisham could exist now–she would be institutionalized in a heartbeat, but back then, this woman could be head of a household and have servants and simply be spoken of as a bit odd.  For odd she is. (more…)

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[ATTENDED: December 9, 2012] A John Waters Christmas

watersSarah and I were pretty excited to go see John Waters: gay icon, movie provocateur and all around oddball.  We had no idea what to expect from this show (his Christmas shows have apparently been around a long time although I have no idea how much it changes per year), but we knew it would be peculiar (and damned funny).

What we got was John Waters in a beautiful sparkly suit talking about seemingly whatever came into his mind (although I know from others that  the routine has the same elements in every show, so I it is not extemporaneous).  He had a podium and a bottle of water, but he used neither.  Instead, he walked around the stage, telling stories, telling jokes and being as filthy as he could.

Since this is a Christmas show, he talks a lot about the holiday (he really likes it, mostly because people give him presents), he talks a lot about sex (the more deviant the better), and he talks about himself.

We were surprised by the age range in the audience   Aside from a few young people (in punk garb), we were the youngest by far.  And while that certainly makes it seem like the older folks of the Branchburg area are much hipper (and dirtier) than I realized, it also makes some sense.  Waters definitely reached his most prolific peak quite some time ago.  And those earlier film were much raunchier than his more recently releases.  By now, Waters has settled in as kind of an outre celebrity but one who is more than happy taking part in pop culture (The Simpsons for instance–quite a long way from Divine eating poop).  We wondered if half of them knew what they were in for–but I didn’t hear any gasps, so I guess they did.  The older attendees could no doubt also appreciate a number of cultural references that were just too old for me. (more…)

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3rdSOUNDTRACK: PHINEAS AND FERB-“I Really Don’t Hate Christmas” (2009).

doofenI have grown to love Phineas and Ferb ever so much  in the past year.  Holy cow it makes me laugh so much  that I would totally watch  it even without the kids around.

This song, sung by the evil Dr Doofenshmirtz, explains how he has a backstory that makes him hate every holiday except Christmas–he just has a burning indifference to it.  The song is catchy and funny.

Of course since he is an evil scientist, he finds a reason to hate Christmas and launch his naughtyinator.  When carolers come to his door and repeat over and over that they want figgy pudding, he begins to get quite annoyed.  And we get this hilarious exchange:

CAROLERS: (singing) We won’t go until we get some, we won’t go until we get some….

DR. DOOFENSHMIRTZ: What? Are you threatening me? How dare you! No one barges into my home and demands desserts! What sort of plan is that anyway? “Let’s go to a stranger’s house, sing songs to him, and refuse to leave unless he hands us a food dish no one’s prepared since the 16th century!”

Just in time for the holidays:

[READ: December 20, 2012] Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Third Wheel

Clark was more excited for this book than I was!  As soon as he saw it, he grabbed it and ran into his room to read it (for which I was both proud and a little annoyed as I wanted to read it).  I’m not sure how much he could have enjoyed it as it is all about going on a date, but he seemed to like it.

It’s not all about a date though.  It begins with Greg reminiscing about his time in the womb (a very odd thing for Clark to read, I’m sure).  rtHis mom listening to Mozart and just how much he could hear while in there.  Then he talks about his life as a wee one, which is very funny–he learned how to take the batteries out of the remote so his mom couldn’t put the educational shows back on (he’s also annoyed that Manny gets to watch whatever he wants now–no educational TV for him).

But Manny doesn’t come out on top all the time–there’s the boy who acts like a vampire at Sunday School and scares Manny to bits.  This may be why Manny only has imaginary friends (well, that and the fact that their mom reads Manny the children’s book she wrote about the boy who used to bite Greg–it  terrifies Manny).  Of course, the imaginary friends get in trouble for all the things Manny does (maybe Manny does come out on top all the time after all).

One of the funnier aspects of the Wimpy Kid series is the locations that they go to.  Like Corny’s, the family restaurant where the key is fun (not food), and the first time they went Greg almost sat on a PB&J sandwich that was never cleared away.  (And wait till you see what the family next to them are doing!). (more…)

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[LISTENED TO: December 2012] It Happened on a Train

brixton3After the raging success of Brixton Brothers Books 1 and 2 we were thrilled to get to Book 3.

Twelve-year old Steve Brixton has given up on being a detective.  His hero, the author of the Bailey Brothers mysteries has proven to be a thief and a liar and he wants nothing to do with the man anymore.  So he has bundled all of his Bailey Brothers books–his favorite books in the world–and put them in the trash.

His chum, Dana, is not that upset about the closing of the agency, especially since he has now been dating a girl named Dana (“other Dana” as Steve calls her).  Other Dana has gotten Dana into a book series about wizards and dragons which Steve simply cannot believe.

This 3rd novel proves to adhere well to the title–it does all happen on a train.  Well, most of it anyhow.  The boys have been invited to the Model U.N. meeting in San Diego.  After last book’s fake debate club ruse, Steve’s mother is very suspicious of the Model U.N., especially since no one has ever heard of it.  [It turns out that my school had a model U.N., but most of us had no idea what they did either–imagine my surprise to see that very organization appear in an episode of Community!]  The story checks out and Rick (jerk) takes this as an opportunity to bond with Stevie Brix (what, you don’t get it) by tagging along for the nine-hour train ride.

Before the train ride gets underway, Steve is approached by a surfer dude who is looking for help.  Steve hears the man’s case but tells him that he has retired (a recurring joke).  It took us a while to get to the end of the story and we had all but completely forgotten about this plot point by the time we got to the end.

Anyhow, on the train, Steve winds up talking to a girl, Claire, whose uncle is a private detective.  The girl is nice but thinks it doesn’t make sense that 12-year-old Steve is retired.  Steve is annoyed by her, and has mixed feelings about her.  But he sees that she has left her book behind, so he finds her to give it back.  But she is nowhere to be seen. (more…)

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41

SOUNDTRACK: SWANS-Live at All Tomorrow’s Parties, October 2, 2011 (2011).

swansatpBefore Swans released this year’s amazing The Seer, they toured supporting their previous album (with a number of songs from The Seer included). This set has two songs from The Seer, “The Apostate” and “The Seer, Pt 1” together they comprise 50 minutes of the nearly two hour show.  The set also includes “No Words No Thoughts” (24 minutes) and “Jim” (a teeny 6 minutes) from 2010’s My Father Will Guide Me Up a Rope to the Sky.  The final track is an eleven minute version of “I Crawled” which goes all the way back to 1984’s Young God EP.

I would never have thought of Swans as a jam band, and yet here they are, with 5 songs in 2 hours.  Although unlike jam bands, they aren’t showing off their musical chops or noodling solos, they are created expressive and moody soundscapes–not as scary as in days of old, but very intense nonetheless.

The set sounds great, although I imagine this would be more enjoyable to watch than to listen to (there a great swaths of music where there’ s not a lot happening).  I wonder what Gira is doing during these stretches.  My friend Phil (or Phillipe Puleo as Gira calls him here) plays drums on the album and on this tour, and I have to say he must be exhausted–man he hits the drums hard.

I listened to this show before I heard The Seer, but it didn’t prepare me for what the album would contain.  Now having heard that album, I appreciate this live show even more–they really master these long songs.  I am going to have to try to see them the next time they swing by.  I admit I used to be afraid at the thought of seeing them because their early music was so intense, but this seems to be a different Swans now, one that an old man like myself could even handle.

The set is no longer available on NPR.

[READ: December 10, 2012] McSweeney’s #41

The cover of this issue has a series of overlapping photographs of lightning.  I didn’t really look at it that closely at first and thought it was an interesting collage.  Indeed, Sarah said it looked like a science textbook of some kind.  But when I read the colophon, I learned that Cassandra C. Jones finds photographs of lightning and (without manipulating them digitally) places them together so that the lightning bolts create shapes.  And indeed, that is what is going on.  And it’s amazing!

The cover’s pictures create a greyhound running (front and back covers show different stages of the run).  There’s also circles and a rabbit running.  It’s incredibly creative and very cool.  You can see some of her work at her site.

The feature of this issue is that there are four stories from Australian Aboriginal Writers, a group that I can honestly say I have never read anything from before.  There’s also beautiful art work accompanying most of the longer stories, three gritty non-fiction pieces and some letters, most of which aren’t very silly at all.

LETTERS (more…)

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CV1_TNY_12_17_12Sorel.inddSOUNDTRACK: PG. 99 Document #8 (2005).

doc8In yesterday’s post I talked about a pg. 99 concert in which they played the entirety of this album.  Since the album is available for streaming (and download) at Robotic Empire, I figured I’d give it a real listen.

While there’s no mistaking that this is the same band, I was surprised by just how nuanced this recording proved to be.  That almost seems like a joke because it is a blistering punishing punk album, but there are a lot of moments where the band is quiet and there’s only one instrument playing, or when you can actually hear lyrics.

The disc opens with a sampled quote about “Playing whatever you want as sloppy as you want.  As long as it’s good and has passion.”  This album is not sloppy at all–it’ s very noisy and chaotic, but the chops are there–the band is very precise.  I also like the unusual guitar sounds in “Your Face is a Rape Scene.”  “The Hollowed Out Chest of a Dead Horse” sounds much better on album than live–you can really hear all of the diverse parts and the interesting tones that the lack of noise produces.  And the ending is really quite beautiful (maybe if it has been in the middle it could have broken up some of the pummeling).

There are two more songs on the album than were played live.  In the concert, the singer said  that they only learned  those seven songs, which may well be true.  I love the title of the one extra track, “The Lonesome Waltz of Leonard Cohen.”  The Final Track, “The List (FILTH)” has a completely different recording style and sound, so I assume it must be some kind of bonus track.  Indeed, some research tells me that these are both bonus tracks, which makes sense as the end of “Horse” does sound like an album ender.

[READ: December 13, 2012] “I Love Girl”

I’ve said before that I really like Simon Rich’s super short jokes.  And I’m a little less enamored of his longer jokes.  This one was three pages and there was a lot to like about it, but something that kind of bugged me as well.

This “story” is about Oog.  He’s a caveman (duh) and he speaks like a caveman (which mostly means leaving the word “a” out before nouns).  Oog is Rock Thrower.  Oog is not too smart–he can’t make words good and although he understands the numbers one and two, he has trouble with three and four.  And forget about five.  But Girl is smart.  And once in school Girl helped him with his math by saying that four was just two twos.  He still doesn’t understand what she meant.

Oog loves Girl.  But Girl belongs to Boog.  Boog is an artist.  He draws pictures of horses and demands respect from everyone.  He also has sex with Girl right in front of everyone. (more…)

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[LISTENED TO: November 2012] The Ghostwriter Secret

brixton2We enjoyed Brixton Brothers Book 1 so much that we couldn’t wait to listen to Book 2.  And it did not disappoint.

Steve Brixton (who is 12) has set up his own detective agency (after the massive success of his first case) and his chum Dana is actually kind of on board with it this time.  Of course, his mom’s boyfriend Rick (jerk) thinks it’s all for laughs and he chuckles at Steve’s business cards.

With the agency all set up, all Steve needs is a case.  Which he quickly gets.  A local billionaire has had his diamond stolen and he wants Steve to help (he heard all about Steve’s success in Book 1).  Rick makes a joke about a bird stealing it (that was a plot in Book 1), but Steve knows that isn’t the case here.  The diamond is an incredibly expensive and valuable diamond which the billionaire keeps on display in his house (under intense security).  And yet somehow, the thief got in.  And the security system must be broken because the alarm keeps going on and off.

Steve quickly solves that case and the billionaire asks Steve to hold onto the diamond until they can catch the crook (Steve figured out HOW it was done, but is leaving it up to the police to figure out WHO did it).

Steve gets a ton of cash to hold onto the diamond, but he’s bored by the case.  He wants some excitement as a detective.  And then he gets a letter–from none other than MacArthur Bart!  Bart is the author of Steve’s beloved Bailey Brothers mystery stories (which he has read hundreds of times and has based all of his sleuthing skills upon).  Steve has been writing to Bart for years, telling him how much he loves the books with no response.  Once he set up the agency, he wrote to Bart telling him about the cases.  And now, finally, Bart has written back.  But it’s not a thank you letter, it’s a request for help.  Bart thinks someone is after him! (more…)

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