SOUNDTRACK: JAMES NEWMAN-“Embers” (England, Eurovision Entry 2021).
.Eurovision 2021 is over and the big news (aside from drug-taking accusations against the winner) is that the entry from England received zero. Nul points.
This is not unique, but it’s not something that anybody wants. It’s actually better to not make the finals than to make the finals and get nul points, because no one is going to forget that.
So just how bad was “embers?”
I’m not going to defend the song, because I would never listen to it on purpose–it’s not my thing. But by the same token I can think of a lot of songs that are much worse than this.
This song is just kind of bland. It thinks its big and catchy with the horns and the “light up the ROOM!” line. But really it just doesn’t do much. I could see this song playing in a club and people would dance to it and then forget it. No one would ask who it was or request it again.
And maybe that’s worth nothing.
[READ: May 26, 2021] 52 Times Britain was a Bellend
Bellend is such a great insult and it is exclusive to Britain, which is a shame.
Also a shame is just how terrible Britain as a country has been throughout history.
Obviously any global superpower is going to be dickish–you get power by crushing others. You could write this same book about the United States and cover just the last four years.
But Felton, whom I’ve never heard of before, but who is apparently a huge Twitter presence, narrowed history down to 52 (one a week) examples of Britain being absolutely horrible (and somehow managing to make it funny).
How did he decide on these events? Well, they are judged by today’s standards (saying “I’m from the past” is no excuse).
What you’ll get here is a good overview of fun and horrifying times when we were cartoonishly evil, from a comedian just as appalled as you are about what shits it turned out we were in the past.
Most of the terrible behavior involves other countries. Like starting wars with China because they wouldn’t buy British opium. Or making Zanzibar pay for the bombs that Britain dropped on them. (more…)





