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Archive for the ‘Magazines’ Category

Skip Horack–“The Cryptozoologist” (Narrative Magazine, Spring 2012)

Posted in Animals, Cryptids, David Bowie, Death, Demons, Funny (strange), Ghosts, Hoax, Kiss, Military, Monkeys, Narrative, Oddities, Short Story, Skip Horack, Van Halen, War on August 22, 2012| Leave a Comment »

SOUNDTRACK: KISS-Hot in the Shade (1989).

Before this album came out, Paul Stanley did a little club tour.  My friends Matt and Nick and I got to see him in Wilkes Barre, PA. It was a pretty great show, and intimate in a way that Kiss shows can never be.  So we were pretty psyched for this new album.  And yes, this album holds special memories or me because we used to listen to it a lot after the show.

The biggest problem with this album is bloat.  I don’t have any kind of evidence to back this up, but this was the first Kiss album that took advantage of the compact disc’s length.  And so it’s easily twenty minutes longer than most Kiss albums (and the later albums had some filler on the already).  Plus it’s  almost longer than Kiss’ first two albums combined.     That’s just too much.

Even Kiss’ weaker albums usually start with a good song.  Not so much Hot in the Shade.  “Rise to It” is pretty generic even by mid 80s Kiss standards.  They try to make it fun with the Ri–e i-e-i part, but it doesn’t quite make it.  “Betrayed” is a bit more of a rocker and is quite a good song.  Lyrically it’s not so great (it’s funny to think of Gene Simmons trying o be down with the common man), but it rocks pretty hard.  My friend Matt and I liked “Hide Your Heart” quite a bit when it came out.  The chorus: Ah ah ah ah, hey hey hey do do do do do do do do do” is pretty bad though.  “Prisoner of Love” musically sounds like Kiss of old, until the verses come in.  “Read My Body” is really catchy until you realize it sounds just like “Pour Some Sugar on Me.”  That’s embarrassing.  Although the metaphor is well done, at least.  “Slap in the Face” might as well be “Let’s Put the X in Sex” from Thrashes Smashes and Hits.

Then comes the cheesiest ballad in Kiss’ history—actually written by Michael Bolton, yes Michael Bolton.  And man do I love it.  Paul is in full voice, he sounds great, the harmonies are spot on.  It is the cheesiest metal ballad ever, but I never get tired of it.  It even has an acoustic guitar solo—pre-made for Unplugged!  “Silver Spoon” is a good rocker, with a fun chorus.  Although the gospel singers at the end are a bit overkill—it seems silly to have invited them in for 90 seconds of singing.  “Cadillac Dreams” is just a bit too close to a Beatles song for my liking.  “King of Hearts” is a decent song, and “The Street Giveth and the Street Taketh Away” (were Kiss really hard up for money?  what’s up with these lyrics?).  We had an in-joke on my dorm floor, so I can never take this song seriously (that may also be because they steal the “Hey man” right out of David Bowie’s mouth).  Love Me to Hate You” is pretty generic although catchy.  “Somewhere Between Heaven and Hell” is also a decent song.

“Little Caesar” is the first (and only, really) song that Eric Carr sang lead vocals on.  As a singer he’s a really good drummer.  The song is pretty generic too and is unfortunately given the same name as a bad pizza company.  “Boomerang” has a good fast pace (once again, not unlike a Van Halen song).

[READ: August 11, 2012] “The Cryptozoologist”

This is yet another short story broken down into lots of little sections.  What’s neat about the way that this one is done is that because the narrator is a cryptozoologist, each section is headed by a cryptid (animals whose existence has not been proven).  But in addition to discussing these animals, the sections also describe a history of the narrator’s life.  His life in this field started when his grandfather told him about a snake which latched onto the end of its own tail and rolled away from its pursuers (section title: Hoop Snakes).  His grandfather never lied, so it had to be true.

It proceeds through The Mušhuššu (a serpent dragon spoken of in ancient Babylon), through the Jenny Hanivers (jeunes d’Anvers), into The Wolf of Ansbach (believed to be an old Bürgermeister who was transformed into a werewolf), and on to The Batutut, a monkey man in Laos.  Most of these sections describe the origins of the cryptids (and his lack of success at spotting them), but The Batutut section is also about himself and how he was in the war when this particular cryptid entered his life.

Then we move on to The Altamaha-Ha in Southeastern Georgia, while Giglioli’s Whale, which had two dorsal fins dates to 1867.  The Mongolian Death Worm, said to live in the sands of the Gobi desert is a cryptid that he actually experienced in the American desert.  he didn’t see it, but he could feel its presence.  The Madagascar Tree is a killing tree–it looks like a pineapple and eats sacrifices.  This story was told by two adventurers who saw the tree eat a woman.  The best part of is that there is no proof that the two men who are credited with telling the story actually existed themselves. (more…)

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Elizabeth Benedict–“Paris in the Twenties” (Narrative Magazine, Spring 2012)

Posted in Annie Hall, Consumerism, Death Wish, Elizabeth Benedict, Ernest Hemingway, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Kiss, Marriage Trouble, Narrative, Nostalgia, Taxi Driver on August 21, 2012| Leave a Comment »

SOUNDTRACK: KISS-Smashes, Thrashes + Hits (1988).

This was Kiss’ second greatest hits collection (Double Platinum being the first).  This was before there were literally hundreds of Kiss Greatest Hits collections.  Seriously, look at the list on AllMusic.  This was also the era in which bands would release a greatest hits collection and include one song to sucker fans into buying it.  And we did.

Kiss also re-recorded a bunch of songs for this disc (something they would do many times in the future as well).  I’m not exactly sure what has been re-recorded, although the one obvious change is that Eric Carr sings on “Beth.”  But some of the other songs get tweaks as well.

As for the two new songs, it seems like maybe they were leftovers from the Crazy Nights sessions–they are poppy with keyboards.  “Let’s Put the X in Sex” sounds a lot like Robert Palmer, which is pretty embarrassing.  Although interestingly, the song itself seems to serve as a model for a couple of songs on Hot in the Shade (as if maybe they thought Kiss fans wouldn’t buy the greatest hits?).  “(You Make Me) Rock Hard” is another okay song (which sounds a lot like another song on Hot in the Shade).  Both of these songs are just filled with sex similes, I swear they have more than any other writers in the world.  Both songs would be better without those pesky keyboards.  I rather liked the songs at the time as they are both better than anything on Crazy Nights, although neither one has held up all that well.

And “Beth,”  Kiss’ biggest hit, which may be largely forgotten by the general public by now, has Eric Carr on vocals.  He sounds a bit like Peter Criss, but without Criss’ years of hard living in his voice.  It’s a weird choice, although I understand it from a business standpoint–which is clearly more important than the music, right?

[READ: August 10, 2012] “Paris in the Twenties”

This story starts out with a paragraph that I found very confusingly written.  There’s a very long sentence with several clauses that, after reading the story, make perfect sense, but which up front are more than a little confusing.  The upshot of that paragraph is that in 1972, when the narrator was a senior in high school, a whole bunch of bad things happened to her in a short period of time–just before they were to hear which of the Seven Sisters had accepted them.

The catalyst was that her father threw a tumbler of scotch at the giant window of their penthouse apartment.  The window shattered but did not fall and the glass came back into the room.  The irony of course is that he had chosen the apartment for the gorgeous panoramic views those windows afforded.  Her father had been riled up about the state of the world, and felt that the sexual revolution meant that monogamy was outdated.

Their father was also very conscious of wealth and was very conscious of appearing wealthy–even if “he usually had more credit than money and now had very little of either.”

The narrator escaped into fantasies of Paris in the twenties–she read A Moveable Feast and was determined to move to Paris even if the party was over decades ago. (more…)

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Mary Miley Theobald–“Putting the Red in Recoats” (Colonial Williamsburg, Summer 2012)

Posted in 18th Century, Colonial Williamsburg, Essays, Field Recordings, Field Recordings, Food, History, Mary Miley Theobald, Metric, NPR/PRI/PBS, Pirates, Yuck! on August 19, 2012| Leave a Comment »

SOUNDTRACK: METRIC-“Synthetica” (Field Recordings, June 20, 2012).

After playing the Sasquatch festival, Emily Haines and James Shaw of Metric went behind the stadium and played a beautiful acoustic rendition of the title song from their latest album.  This Field Recording [Metric In A Non-Synthetic Situation] is just so wide open as to be inconceivable–especially since they’d just played a festival.

Metric make beautiful music which is rocking and usually full of all manner of electronic noises.  To hear Haines’ voice stripped from any effects shows just what a great and interesting voice she has.   It’s always nice to hear the song underneath the song.  This is a great version of the song.  Watch it here.

[READ: July 25, 2012] “Putting the Red in Redcoats”

Have you ever thought about how the redcoats’ coats became red?  No, me either.  Well, amazingly, it came from the Cochineal, the same bug that is still used today to color foods.

Cochineal bugs are pretty bizarre.  The female lives her entire life on a prickly pear cactus.  When she hatches, she clamps onto the prickly pear and starts feeding.  She grows to the size of a head of a pin. but never leaves the spot.  The male flies around, but only lives for a week.  The female lays eggs and the babies continue the process.

Although she is immobile, she is also armed with carminic acid, which predators don’t like.  Carminic acid is a vibrant red colorant.  Aztecs first mined this amazing color, which naturally impressed Spanish conquistadores who wanted to take it for themselves.  And they made a lot of money selling it to Europe.  But the Spanish never told anyone that the color came from bugs–they kept the secret for themselves.

Of course pirates and privateers would often hijack ships (one score captured 27 tons of cochineal!). (more…)

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Ivor Noël Hume–“Mecklenburg’s Declaration of Independence” (Colonial Williamsburg, Summer 2012)

Posted in 18th Century, 19th Century, Colonial Williamsburg, Essays, Field Recordings, Field Recordings, History, Ivor Noël Hume, Now, Now, NPR/PRI/PBS on August 18, 2012| Leave a Comment »

SOUNDTRACK: NOW, NOW-“But I Do” (Field Recordings, August 8, 2012).

This is an NPR Field Recording, [Now Now at Graffiti Park]which means they brought equipment to Graffiti Park in Texas and recorded Now, Now playing this song live.  You can watch the video here.

The video opens with the band lugging their gear into the weird little foundation of space.  (This explains why there are no drums, clearly).  And so the band with two guitars and a xylophone (and a shaker) play their song and sound great doing it.  This is something of a stripped down version of the bands usually more shoegazery sound, but even in this format the band sounds great–the song is catchy, the melody is pretty and their harmonies are great.

I haven’t heard the original of this, but this is now the third Now, Now song that I’ve really enjoyed.

[READ: August 1, 2012] “Mecklenburg’s Declaration of Independence”

The previous issue of Colonial Williamsburg surprised me with several articles that I found really interesting.  Although this issue was filled with a little more about current local happenings (bulldozers and updates) they still managed to pack in a number of interesting articles.

According to this article, in 1775 Captain James Jack delivered a document to the Second Continental Congress.  On May 19, 1775, select officers from North Carolina, seeing the kind of fighting that was happening against the British in Massachusetts made up several resolves.  The fist stated:

We hearby absolve ourselves from all allegiance to the British Crown, and abjure all political connection, contract, or association, with that nation, who have wantonly trampled on our rights and liberties, and inhumanely shed the blood of American patriots at Lexington.

This “declaration of independence:” preceded Thomas Jefferson’s Declaration of Independence by fourteen months.  The document never reached its destination in the intended form and it was almost forgotten.

But then in 1819, the editor of the Raleigh Register and North Carolina Gazette wrote about this “Mecklenburg Declaration.”  The news surprised John Adams who had never heard of the document.  Adams praised the document (Adams didn’t really like Jefferson).  But Jefferson called it questionable: “I believe it spurious.”  This led to an intrastate rivalry with Virginia claiming the Declaration of Independence as the true one and North Carolina claiming the Declaration of Independence a plagiarism!  Jefferson even went as far as to question the patriotism of North Carolinians.

The controversy is complicated by a document from May 31 a facsimile of which seems to show signatures cut from court records and imitations of the designer’s handwriting.

It’s all somewhat moot as the Continental Congress applauded the intention of the letter but felt that adopting the Mecklenburg resolves was premature.  And therefore it was not a usurper of the actual Declaration of Independence.  But in North Carolina, the document is held up as official.  It became a page of official North Carolina history in 1831 and in 1861, the state voted  to add the date to the state flag.

American history caught up in 1954 when President Eisenhower acknowledged the men who signed the “Mecklenburg Declaration.”  Who knew?

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Amy Parker–“Rainy Season” (Narrative Magazine, Winter 2012)

Posted in Adventure, Amy Parker, Boredom, Drinking, Drugs, Kiss, Narrative, Sex, Short Story, Van Halen on August 16, 2012| Leave a Comment »

SOUNDTRACK: KISS-Crazy Nights (1987).

I’m going to make a bold statement here—Crazy Nights is worse than The Elder.  Whereas The Elder was a mistake–weird songs, a bizarre concept, it showed some pretty ballsy moves.  Crazy Nights on the other hand is just a pandering mess.  There’s keyboards.  Keyboards!  The band has always been money makers (Gene Simmons’ face could be on the $100), but at least usually their music would find its own version of poppiness.  But this album sounds like any generic metal album from the late 80s.

“Crazy Crazy Nights” is an obnoxiously poppy sell-out of a song (although it is at least catchy, but man…).  “Fight Hell to Hold You” is the exception to the disc, a solid song from Paul with a good chorus.  But “Bang Bang You” is as dumb as it sounds.  It has cheesy keyboards, a lame riff and even has the audacity to reference “Love Gun.”  It’s hard to fault Bruce Kulick for his wild playing, but it seems so out of place on this disc–as if his crazy solos will make the album heavier.  Much like on Asylum, he gets a song to wail on the opening: “No No No” which is sort of winning by virtue of its non-stop propulsion (like say, “Hot for Teacher”).  But it’s not really a song so much as a series of connected sounds.

  “Come Hell or High Water” is pretty close to being a good song, perhaps the rest of the album taints this one too.  What’s especially crazy about the keyboards on “My Way” is that they sounds straight out of Van Halen’s 1984. [None of this is to imply I don’t like Van Halen, I just don’t want Kiss sounding like them].  “When Your Walls Come Down” feels heavy in comparison to the rest of the disc, especially when followed by the super-ballad “Reason to Live” (which despite myself I kind of like).  “Good Girl Gone Bad” is generic lyrically and musically.  “Turn on the Night” brings more cheese and more keyboards.   And “Thief in the Night” ends the disc on a reasonably high note.  But the problem is that the music is such generic pop metal that it’s hard to be inspired by any of it.

I’m kind of surprised Kulick stuck around during this–two albums in a row!.  Although he did get to show off his squealing chops, so maybe he was happy.

[READ: August 10, 2012] “Rainy Season”

This story came in second place in the Narrative Magazine Fall contest.  I had been putting off reading it because it was quite long and I didn’t really have enough time to devote to it.  When that time finally arrived, I was glad I waited.

This is a story about Jill and Maizie.  Their father works at the Thailand consulate (something to do with drugs).  And so the girls have been living in a gated compound for three months in Chaing Mai, Thailand. They are bored out of their minds.  They are not permitted to leave the compound, they are the only Americans around and all they can really do is watch Gone with the Wind (which they have memorized).  The girls have been trying to make the best of things, although it’s not always easy.  Especially given the way their father is.

Their parents got divorced some time ago and the girls have never lived in the same place for more than two years.  What’s worse is that their father is working all the time.  So when he is around, he’s not really around for them.  He is very strict about arbitrary things but is completely blind to others: “Maizie and Jill aren’t allowed to pierce their ears until they’re sixteen, he says. But he goes on trips to the Golden Triangle and leaves them alone in the house.”

Maizie is younger and she is super cute with comment-worthy blonde hair.  She gets away with a lot.  Jill is older.  She is no longer cute and she is resentful of both her father and her sister.  Of course, they only have each other, which Jill resents a bit too. (more…)

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Sam Lipsyte–“Get a Head of Steam for Your Self-Esteem” (This Land, April 2011)

Posted in "Weird Al" Yankovic, Comedy Bang Bang!, Funny (ha ha), Reggie Makes Music, Reggie Watts, Sam Lipsyte, Tenacious D, This Land on August 12, 2012| Leave a Comment »

SOUNDTRACK: “WEIRD AL” YANKOVIC and REGGIE WATTS-Reggie makes Music on IFC (2012).

“Weird Al” is going to be on Comedy Bang Bang this week.  And to tie in with his appearance, Al (and Tenacious D, who are in the video but don’t really do anything) performed a song with Reggie.  Specifically, Reggie does some beatboxing while Al wails on the accordion.

There’s nothing funny about it (well, actually there is, although there are no words), but Al shows how an accordion should be played!

If you like your polka fast and furious, check it out.

[READ: August 6, 2012] “Get a Head of Steam for Your Self-Esteem”

I’ve enjoyed Sam Lipsyte’s humor quite a lot.  This is a very short jokey piece in This Land.  This is the second piece I’ve read in This Land, not bad for a publication I’d never heard of before the first one.

So this is a “letter of affirmation.”  As Lipsyte’s introduction explains:

Write a note of affirmation with a good fountain pen and thick creamy paper and put it in your purse, wallet or lunch, or else simply text the message. The example below is one I use for myself, but you may use it as a model, substituting details as needed. (more…)

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Zadie Smith–“Permission to Enter” (New Yorker, July 30, 2012)

Posted in Boredom, Food, Kiss, Masturbation, Monie Love, New Yorker, Set at School, Short Story, Sonic Youth, Zadie Smith on August 9, 2012| Leave a Comment »

SOUNDTRACK: KISS-Lick It Up (1983).

Kiss takes off their makeup!  And they look…like normal guys with lots of hair (How has Paul’s hair stayed so spectacular for so long?).

Lick It Up was a transformative album for Kiss, in which they suddenly gained new respect and new fans.  And yet somehow, that impressive amazing tongue really looks kind of dumb without all the makeup on, sorry Gene.  They also added (officially) Vinnie Vincent to the band (see he’s right there on the cover!). I tend to hate the song “Lick It Up” with a real passion.  In part because it was overplayed and in part because it’s terrible.  Vinnie Vincent was supposed to be this amazing guitarist and that’s what he came up with?  Blah.  Maybe he felt hampered by Kiss and that’s why he made the wank-fest that was Vinnie Vincent Invasion.

As a result I tend to overlook this album, but “Exciter” is a great, rocking track.  It’s fast and heavy and is really propulsive.  “Not for the Innocent” is one Gene’s great songs—heavy and dark with a cool chorus (Much better than some of his recent affairs).  “Young and Wasted” starts out kind of tripping over itself but man the chorus is great.

“Give Me More” is a straight out fast rocker.  The song never stops and there’s a great old-school Kiss Chorus  too.  “All Hell’s Breaking Loose” also has an old school sound—a kind of “Hotter Than Hell” feel.  And of course, who doesn’t love when Paul rambles nonsensically, “Hey man, I am cool, I am the breeze.”  “A Million to One” is kind of a generic Kiss song—not bad (certainly not as bad as some of their songs) but nothing terribly exciting.

“Fits Like a Glove” is one of Gene’s dirty songs, it has a good bridge/chorus structure.  Kiss may have set a record for the most similes when it comes to sex.  “Dance All Over Your Face” is pretty silly, probably the worst song on the disc.  The lyrics are, well, Gene, and it even has a break where it’s just drums (a terrible way to force a song to be an anthem).  At least the album ends on a high note with “And on the 8th Day.”  True it’s yet another attempt for the band to have an anthem about rock, and it starts out a little anemic, but this is what they do best, and even a middling Kiss anthem is a good one.   Somehow I think about Eric Carr singing along to this and it makes the song seem better.

Whereas Creatures of the Night was overlooked by most people, Lick It Up is overlooked by me.  It needs a higher ranking in my Kiss lists.

[READ: July 30, 2012] “Permission to Enter”

I’m very happy to see a new Zadie Smith story in The New Yorker.  I know she left her gig at Harper’s to work more on writing.  And here’s some of the fruits.  It’s funny to me that this one is done in a series of numbered sections–a strange microtrend that I have been experiencing lately.  It’s strange for Zadie because I find that her transitions and narrative structure are always very strong, so to eschew that for these little chapter breaks is surprising.  Of course, if she spelled everything out it would have been much longer and–given the content, potentially less effective.

So this is the story of Keisha Blake and Leah Hanwell.  When they first met they were four years old.  They were “swimming” in a shallow trough in a park in Hampstead when (and no one saw it happen) Keisha rescued Leah from drowning.  Leah’s mother was so grateful that she invited Keisha over and Keisha and Leah became best friends (even though there are so may differences between their families and they clearly would have never been friends otherwise, really under any circumstances).

And so each titled section reveals something new about their young friendship.  For example, “6. Some Answers” gives just the answers to a series of questions which economically show the difference and similarities between these two girls).  The girls grow up together.  They grow apart a little as friends will.  While Leah and her other friends liked Sonic Youth, Keisha (and no other friends) liked Monie Love. But they stayed close friends anyhow (never really questioning why they were friends–a wonderful detail). (more…)

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Hanna Pylväinen–“Jonas Chan” (Harper’s, August 2012)

Posted in Boredom, Cars, Decadence, Hanna Pylväinen, Harper's, Kiss, Religion, Sex, Shoplifting, Short Story on August 8, 2012| Leave a Comment »

SOUNDTRACK: KISS-Creatures of the Night (1982).

In true fair-weather fashion, Music from The Elder ended my Kiss love–and I was a HUGE Kiss fan!  Which is a shame because their follow up album–Creatures of the Night, which I wouldn’t get for many many years is one of their heaviest and strongest albums.  Although there may be just as much fun/controversy about the cover than there is talk about the music.  Ace Frehley was contractually obligated to appear on their album covers, so his face is on the (original) cover even though he didn’t play a note on the record.

The album was re-issued in 1985 in a non-makeup version.  And this album features Bruce Kulick’s photo on the cover because he was then the guitarist in the band.  However, it was actually Vinnie Vincent who played all the guitar on the record and while he is credited, he doesn’t appear on the cover of either version.

This album also features Eric Carr on drums and he pounds the hell out of them.  Carr was on The Elder, but, well, we won’t talk about that.  Peter Criss had a kind of jazzy impact on the drums, but Carr was a heavy metal drummer and it really changes the sound of the album.

“Creatures of the Night” opens with a really heavy title track sung by Paul–he’s got his aggressive vocals down very well here (a song that might normally gone to Gene but which works better with Paul).  The only problem is the little poppy section just before the guitar solo–it’s almost dancey and doesn’t really fit.  “Saint and Sinner” starts off kind of unpromising–an almost poppy song by Gene, but the chorus redeems it.  “Keep Me Comin'” has a pretty typical-by-now Kiss chorus and a fast riff.  “Rock and Roll Hell” opens with almost all bass notes (and Gene’s voice).  It’s a pretty standard rocker for the time, but it still sounded fresh coming from Kiss (and it’s about Ace Frehley who wanted out of the band so badly).

“Danger” has some unexpected chord changes and features some of Paul’s excellent vocals.  It’s also got some genuinely fast guitar work (something that most Kiss song don’t have aside from the solos).  “I Love It Loud” is the anthem that should have been huge.  Slow, ponderous and catchy, this song should be played at every sports event.  It’s followed by the impressive 6-minute sorta ballad “I Still Love You,” the kind of song that Paul shines in–he gets a place to show off his impressive range and his ability to hold long notes (especially live).  Between this and “I Want You” Paul could keep an audience entertained for 20 minutes.  What’s best about the song is that although it opens as a ballad, it gets really heavy with some great drum fills from Carr.

“Killer” opens with a guitar sound like “Makin’ Love” of old.  Simmons’ songs about women are usually pretty uninspired and lyrically this is poor, but the music more than makes up for it.  An album this good can’t possibly end strong though, can it?  Why yes, it can.  “War Machine” is another awesome heavy track.  A great riff and a fantastic chorus.  It’s a shame that this record was lost in the shuffle, it really stands tall as a great heavy metal album.

[READ: August 8, 2012] “Jonas Chan”

I loved looking at the author name and the title of this story and having literally no idea what to expect.  I couldn’t even imagine what nationality the name Pylväinen was.  The first character introduced was named Uppu Rovaniemi (nor could I fathom what nationality that was).  And then the main character is Chinese and is named Jonas.  Woah.

Well, it turns out the story is about Finnish people.  I assume that means that Pylväinen is Finnish, although her website only says she is from suburban Detroit.

I have never read anything about Finnish people, I don’t believe.  So this was a wonderfully unique story for me.  And then to narrow the focus even more, Uppu and her family practice Laestadianism, a kind of Lutheranism that I had never heard of (Wikipedia is pretty informative about its convoluted history).  Her family is pretty lax about her (they have nine kids and she gets lost in the shuffle), but they are very strict about her religious upbringing (her father is a preacher).  And Uppu hates that.

Uppu is the ninth child of the fabled Rovaniems, the well-known family in the community, full of intelligent people, all of whom Uppu intended to show up.  She was confident and smart and seemed immune to everyone.  She flies through her exams.  She even recognizes that Jonas was a violin player who switched to viola (she could tell by the amount of weight he put on his bow).  Cool.

Jonas Chan was new to the school, but of course he knew who Uppu was as well.  He couldn’t imagine ever talking to her.  I love this description of him: “He wasn’t nerdy enough for the nerds, no one cared that he came from California, and there were exactly enough Asians for him to be different without being interesting.”  And yet one day Uppu linked arms with him and said “Let’s be friends.”  And so it was. (more…)

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William Gaddis–[Week 7] JR [#OccupyGaddis pages 461-535] (1975)

Posted in #OccupyGaddis, Big Books, Books about music, Death, Georges Bizet, Huh?, Marriage Trouble, Ms., New Yorker, Religion, Seinfeld, Sex on August 6, 2012| 3 Comments »

SOUNDTRACK: GEORGES BIZET-Overture/Habanera (1874), Nocturne in D major (1867).

Bizet is best known (to me anyway) as the creator of Carmen.  And the Overture is utterly recognizable while “Habanera” is probably one of  the more recognizable vocal operas (you know it).  But Bast and co. seem to known Bizet from his piano work, which I didn’t know at all.

I chose “Nocturne in D major” at random.  It’s very pretty, but nowhere near as memorable as say “Habanera.”

I don’t play piano and I’m not a huge classical music fan (although I do know many composers).  Listening to this piece anyhow, I find it hard to understand how people could recognize Bizet in Bast’s work.  Obviously there are dozens of other pieces that may be more representative of a signature sound, but this just sounds like a beautiful (and not overly challenging like Chopin) piano piece to me.  It’s also true that this piano piece was written ten years before Carmen, and maybe they are thinking of the music of Carmen as recognizably Bizet (can you even play Carmen on the piano?).

I forgot how much I enjoy this opera though, (or at least the highlights).

[READ: Week of July 30, 2012] JR Week 7

I enjoyed this week’s read very much.  It had some real emotional scenes–and a scene that stayed with just the same two people for a long time.  It was also interesting to see Gaddis handle sex–in his own detached mechanical way.  And I liked starting to see the pieces (Davidoff, the Waldorf) start falling into place (as they may also be falling apart).

But before we get to that we must look at a doctored photo.  The photo from Mrs Joubert’s class’ interaction with the folks at Diamond Cable has come back and they have added black to the class.  Mr Hyde notices immediately  that his son (“tell by his haircut” (461)) has been darkened, “Blackface in every one of them.”  “Looks like he’s about ready to get down on one knee and sing Mammy” (461).  While Hyde is outraged, the rest of the room is complementing Whiteback and the company for promoting racial diversity.  It’s even suggested that this will help the Major’s image on the other side of town.   Of course underneath all of this is some festering racism: (more…)

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Simon Rich–“Unprotected” (New Yorker, July 30, 2012)

Posted in All Songs Considered, Cocteau Twins, Funny (ha ha), Mark Lanegan, New Yorker, Ormonde, Sex, Short Story, Simon Rich, Virginity (Loss of) on August 4, 2012| Leave a Comment »

SOUNDTRACK: ORMONDE-“Cherry Blossom” (2012).

This song was also mentioned in the July 31 All Songs Considered Post.  The album had been singled out because the cover is so awful. It had even made their repository of awful covers.  And then they actually listened  to it.

It opens with some female vocals, but they are quickly replaced by a kind of whispered/sung male vocal.  Behind the vocals are some simple guitar melodies and a straightforward drum.  But there’s something otherworldly about the whole proceedings–not least of which comes when the whole thing shifts to a minor key.  The keyboard solo (which sounds like it’s a $5 Casio) brings more ethereal female vocals (maybe Cocteau Twins-y) and introduces a kind of Middle Eastern mysticism to the whole thing.

The track is so strange and so pretty (the vocals are not unlike Mark Lanegan or a mellower Josh Homme) and the pieces fit together very well.  I’m very interested in hearing more from this album, regardless of the cover.  Bob and Robin admitted that although they can usually judge an album by its cover, they had no idea that the music inside would be this interesting.

[READ: July 30, 2012] “Unprotected”

I love Simon Rich’s comedy.  Simple as that.

But there are some things of his that I like more than others.  I like his really short (like one paragraph) absurdist jokes quite a lot.  I have liked less his longer story-jokes.  So I was a little bummed that this was the latter.

Especially since it seemed kind of obvious at first (and  I really don’t care for this type of “uneducated” narration: “I born in factory.  They put me in wrapper.  They seal me in box.  Three of us in box.”  It seemed like it was going to be obvious.  And I guess it was kind of, except that Rich found a new angle on the life of a condom.

A boy steals the box and puts him in his wallet.  But where that could have gone in a very bad direction, it doesn’t.  Rich is clever and funny and introduces us to all of the other things in the wallet (Blockbuster Card (when was this set?), Learners Permit etc).   And we see that as the condom goes unused, the makeup of the wallet changes–in comes a Metrocard (who is all hilariously knowledgeable) and a creepy lady named Visa.

By the end of the story, the narrator has been taken out twice–both results are funny.  And the end of the story is surprisingly touching.

It’s a more mature outing from Rich, even if it is about a condom.

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