SOUNDTRACK: CHILLING THRILLING SOUNDS OF THE HAUNTED HOUSE (1964).
The cover during Phish’s 2014 concert was of this album.
Apparently many people grew up with this record. I personally didn’t know it, but if you read the comments (don’t read the comments!) on any YouTube clip of the album you will see how popular it is.
Wikipedia describes it as intended for “older children, teenagers, and adults” released by Disneyland Records (now known as Walt Disney Records). The album was mainly composed of sound effects that had been collected by the sound effects department of Walt Disney Studios. The album was released in several different forms. The album was first released in 1964 in a white sleeve, with a second release in 1973 with an orange sleeve. In both versions, the first side contained 10 stories narrated by Laura Olsher, complete with sound effects. The second side contained 10 sound effects meant for others to create their own stories.
Despite the title, most of the cuts had nothing to do with haunted houses or witches or ghostly spirits. Featured were such situations as an ocean liner hitting rocks, an idiotic lumberjack, a man crossing an unsafe bridge, someone lighting a stick of dynamite and a spaceship landing on Mars. Also, there are tracks with several examples of cats, dogs and birds (similar to “The Birds”) becoming enraged for some reason, as well as a skit about Chinese water torture. In addition, some of the screams were taken directly from the scene where Miss Havisham catches fire in the 1946 David Lean film Great Expectations.
The full track listing is
- “The Haunted House” 3:00
- “The Very Long Fuse” 1:28
- “The Dogs” 1:13
- “Timber” 1:45
- “Your Pet Cat” 0:49
- “Shipwreck” 1:39
- “The Unsafe Bridge” 1:21
- “Chinese Water Torture” 2:02
- “The Birds” 0:46
- “The Martian Monsters” 1:41
- “Screams and Groans” 0:57
- “Thunder, Lightning and Rain” 2:01
- “Cat Fight” 0:37
- “Dogs” 0:48
- “A Collection Of Creaks” 1:54
- “Fuses and Explosions” 1:11
- “A Collection Of Crashes” 0:45
- “Birds” 0:33
- “Drips and Splashes” 1:18
- “Things In Space” 0:53
Nothing is especially scary–although maybe for a kid, as many adults claim to have been really frightened by it. Everything is quite over the top, especially the screams and cat howls and dog snarling. Even the stories are a little silly, although having them in the second person is pretty genius.
But things like “one night as you lie in your lonely room in your stone hut on the moors…” (What?). And the Martian one. Just keeping with continuity: if “you,” meaning me, went on the trip, then I couldn’t hear the crunching as it ate me. Or the silly voice saying “I wonder what that was.”
And the less said about the horribly racist Chinese Water Torture the better. I mean, the opening is bad enough: “The ancient Chinese were a very clever race” but the end of the song is really awful. But if we can look past that, the rest of the record has fun with sound effects and is generally pretty enjoyable.
During the John Congleton interview, he also talks about this album and says (at 40:28) “the speakers are 180 degrees out of phase to make it sound extremely stereophonic.” He says now as an engineer it is totally painful to listen to. Bob says it sounds like it comes from the back of your head.
[READ: October 15, 2017] Half-Minute Horrors.
The premise of this book (edited by Susan Rich) is simple: how scared can you get in 30 seconds? To me, the answer is actually not very. I guess for me fear builds over time. It’s hard to get genuinely frightened over something that just suddenly happens (unless it is just trying to frighten you quickly, of course).
Having said that, I enjoyed this book a lot (look at the list of authors!). I liked the arbitrary goal of writing a scary story in a paragraph or two (or more). And some of them were really quite creepy.
I was originally going to point out which ones I felt were the most creepy, but there are so many stories, I kind of lost track. So instead, here’s a rundown and a brief summary.
Lemony Snicket-“Something You Ought to Know”
Snicket plays with the idea of the left hand not knowing what the right hand is doing–the way you don’t know what the man with the knife is doing in your room.
Jerry Spinelli-“The Chicken of the Egg”
This story settles the debate pretty quickly. Not scary, kind of gross. But darkly amusing.
Kenneth Oppel-“In Hiding”
I loved the twist in this story of two people lying very still in a dark bedroom–a very different point of view.
Richard Sala-“The Old Man in the Picture”
This is a short graphic novel. The pictures add a little extra spookiness to this story of a painting whose eyes follow you for a good reason.
Erin Hunter-“The Babysitter”
It’s not only houses in the middle of the woods that can be scary for babysitters.
James Patterson-“Grand Entrance”
There’s nothing specific about this story, just general fear. And the final line is comically frightening.
Sonya Sones-“Halloween Mask”
This is a rhyming poem. The rhyme makes it seem more funny than scary, although it has a good twist.
Tom Genrich & Michèle Perry-“Tenton”
Tenton is the girl’s stuffed white rat. But when the girl tells Tenton that he simply must take her place at school….
Angela Johnson-“Nanny”
What if the Nanny who protects you from the spooky shadows is actually in league with them?
Jon Klassen-“The Legend of Alexandra & Rose”
This one page image is wonderful. A very simple premise of a house with numbers in various places. It’s impossible to say much more without giving it away except that you have to read the numbers in sequence.
Arthur Slade-“What’s Coming”
You get what’s coming to you. Do you believe that? Would you risk it for a piece of silver?
M.T. Anderson-“An Easy Gig”
Perhaps if the baby you are babysitting is too quiet, you might want to check on it. And watch out for the lasagna.
Yvonne Prinz-“Mr. Black”
The man next door is dressed exactly the same every day. What if he’s not the only one who looks like that? This one was good for a chill.
M.E. Kerr-“The Foot Dragger”
Be careful when you try to surprise someone–he or she may not be who you think.
Adam Rex-“Trick”
This story isn’t really scary exactly (although with more thought it can be realistically scary). It does make you wonder if you should ever trick or treat at a house with no lights on.
Dean Lorey-“Hank”
If your adorable puppy starts talking to you, it might be time to run.
Sarah Weeks-“One of a Kind”
This is the story of a fisherman pulling in a big catch. It ties back directly to an expensive gift he bought for his girlfriend.
Gloria Whelan-“A Walk Too Far”
If you get lost, you can’t always rely on the kindness of strangers.
Holly Black-“A Very Short Story”
This is far longer than about one-third of the other stories in the book. Zoe asks her mom about various monsters. Her mom reassures her until that one last line might not reassure us very much.
Faye Kellerman-“Deep Six”
This is a violent story of revenge. In a pool. To a mean girl. With long hair. Not really scary, but satisfying.
Lisa Brown-“The Turn of the Screw” by Henry James as told to Lisa Brown in Fewer than 30 seconds.
Using three cartoon panels, she sums up the story in a remarkably simple but creepy way.
Pseudonymous Bosch-“The Attack of the Flying Mustaches”
Even if there is a sinister underbelly at work (or maybe the story is just about aging), it’s hard to be frightened of flying mustaches.
Nadia Aguiar-“Takowanda”
I believe this is the longest story in the book. It involves a lonely child, the cries of birds and the hope of playing with other children. As well as a very bad decision.
Sienna Mercer-“Heart Stopper”
If you are believe that falling into freezing cold water will stop your heart, read no further.
Jack Gantos-“Up to My Elbow”
If that bug bite on your hand looks bad before bed, better keep an eye on it in the morning.
Stephen Marche-“Four Gleams in the Moonlight”
Flashes of light can be a lot of trouble.
Brad Meltzer-“The Goblin Book”
What if the book was the one reading you?
Lane Smith-“Worms”
This is a graphic novel depiction of what happens in your coffin.
Carol Gorman-“The Dare”
What if you dare someone to enter a house and they don’t come back?
David Rich-“The Ballad of John Grepsy.”
A song you do not want to sing on a camping trip.
Jenny Nimmo-“Soup”
Comprised of four sentences, this is a wonderfully effective, super short story.
Margaret Atwood-“The Creeping Hand”
The hand is creeping–but something is holding it back. But hands can take care of things themselves.
Mariko Tamaki-“Wet Sand, Little Teeth”
I loved the way this story was constructed. A girl runs into Jenny from three cottages over. Jenny has found a pretty deep hole. Jenny seems to be protecting the girl from the hole. I love the last line.
Brian Selznick-“A Thousand Faces”
This is a drawing of mildly creepy creatures (far fewer than 1,000).
Francine Prose-“Chocolate Cake”
The narrator suspects that his parents are aliens. What if he gives his mom some food she’s allergic to?
Ayelet Waldman-“At the Water’s Edge”
What if the last place to hide is in a canoe in the middle of a small lake?
R.L. Stine-“My Worst Nightmare”
This story has a wonderful twist–a comical, frightening twist about who is living in your closet.
Adele Griffin-“The Beast Outside”
This story was just kind of weird. Jane destroys a dollhouse and then is mad at the results.
Aliza Kellerman-“Unannounced”
A classic tale of a visitor you don’t expect or want, one you thought was long gone.
Mark Crilley-“Kruger’s Sausage Haus”
This is a short graphic piece. We get a creepy visual explanation of how come Kruger can sell his pork for such a cheap price.
Allan Stratton-“There’s Something Under the Bed”
So many beds in this book! This one is short and to the point.
Sarah L. Thomspon-“Cat’s Paw”
A talking cat warning you about something that’s even more frightening that itself?
Katherine Applegate-“Horroku”
This is indeed a haiku. It’s pretty effective.
Avi-“The Itch”
Sometimes your skin itches because things are growing unexpectedly.
Gail Carson Levine-“The New Me: a Pantoum”
The pantoum is a form of poetry; there are repeating lines throughout the poem. It is composed of a series of quatrains; the second and fourth lines of each stanza are repeated as the first. The pattern continues for many number of stanzas, except for the final stanza, which differs in the repeating pattern. I found myself far more engaged in the rhyme than the scare.
David Stahler, Jr.-“Always Eleven”
There’s only one reason why someone is always 11 years old.
Carson Ellis-“Aloft”
A few lines and Ellis’s lovely drawing. Not exactly spooky, but cool.
Tui T. Sutherland-“Skittering”
This one probably freaked me out the most. And I’m not afraid of spiders. The story comes down mostly to spiders taking revenge, but the writing is very subtle.
Abi Slone-“Stuck in the Middle”
When the door to the cellar stairs closes unexpectedly.
Joseph Delaney-“All Fingers and Thumbs!”
I love that the title comes into play in two different ways in this story.
Alan Gratz-“Don’t Wet the Bed”
Your choice is facing the thing under the bed or wetting it.
Josh Greenhut illustrated by Brett Helquist-“The Final Word”
When the Ouija board will not be denied.
Neil Gaiman-“The Shadow”
This story is so wonderfully evasive and unspecific–what does the dog actually have? It’s really quite creepy.
Lesley Livingston-“A Day at the Lake”
There’s nothing to be frightened of in the lake–as long if you are going quickly by on waterskis.
Jon Scieszka-“Whispered”
Of all the under the bed stories, this might be the least successful.
Vladimir Radumsky-“A Disturbing Limerick”
Limericks are only funny. As is this one.
Alison McGhee-“Through the Veil”
What would it be like to be your own shadow?
Daniel Ehrenhaft-“The Rash”
If a rash covers your whole face, are you still in there?
Melissa Marr-“Where Nightmares Walk”
You know that nightmare where you can’t move?
Chris Raschka-“On a Tuesday That Time of Year”
I love the specific (yet vague) way this story begins. But really it’s all about searching your sock drawer. Hope you don’t feel something before you see it.
Stacy Godenir-“Death Rides a Pink Bicycle”
This really short story packs in a twist, a ghost and a threat. All wrapped up on a pink bike.
Dan Gutman-“I’m Not Afraid”
The list of things that are not frightening. It grows longer and longer. Until you realize that there’s a good reason he’s not afraid of those things.
Alice Kuipers-“The Doll”
Can you invert the effects of a voodoo doll?
Frank Viva-“Easy Over”
The presentation of this story was very confusing as I thought the two page “punchline” was a different story entirely. I’m not even sure it’s very funny.
Libba Bray-“Them”
When you get to the safety of your home and it’s possible that they got there first.
Joyce Carol Oates-“Tiger Kitty”
Cute kitty has been acting a bit differently since she got lost outside for three days. Can you guess the secret?
Jonathan Lethem-“Inventory”
You don’t want to know what’s in this guy’s cupboard.
Michael Connelly-“Shortcut”
Sometimes there’s a really good reason people don’t use the shortcut. Especially when the bricks are not what they seem.
Lauren Myracle-“Strawberry Bubbles”
This is the first story in which the narrator fights back and actually seems to win. It’s that sweet smell of strawberry that saves the day. This was actually the longest piece, and it was my favorite.
Barry Yourgrau-“We Think You Do”
A spooky house. You dare to go in. What if what you find there knows more about you than you do?
Aaron Renier-“The Prisoner of Eternia”
This graphic piece explores the idea that those three holes in the brick are actually airholes.
Gregory Maguire-“In Conclusion”
The two last words are really the last words.
~~~
This collection was pretty fun. I don;t know that anyone would be really frightened by these but maybe a person just starting out with Halloween horrors would think twice about doing a few of these things.
Happy Halloween!
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