I Just Read About That…

SOUNDTRACK: THE FLAMING LIPS-“Halloween on the Barbary Coast” (1992).

A lot of the music I listen to is weird and probably creepy to other people, but I don’t necessarily think of songs as appropriate for Halloween or not.  So for this year’s Ghost Box stories, I consulted an “expert”: The Esquire list of Halloween songs you’ll play all year long.  The list has 45 songs–most of which I do not like.  So I picked 11 of them to post about.

Clearly this Esquire list is not meant to be scary or Halloween-appropriate songs.  Many of them might have a Halloween-type word in the title or chorus, but since they are songs you might want to listen to all year, the’re not really holiday specific.

There are songs that have Halloween in the title, like this one.  Although this song really has nothing whatsoever to do with Halloween.  Nor is it scary in any way.  It’s just weird trippy, pre-radio-friendly Flaming Lips.

Wayne Coyne’s voice is high and the main guitar riff is fluid and kind of catchy.  After a minute, the song shifts to a kind of acoustic stomping song.

The lyric does include the line “boy you still got shit for brains/it’s Halloween on the coast again.”  Of course it also references a Christmas tree, so I guess it could be a Christmas song too?

There’s a vaguely Middle Eastern feel to the middle portion of the song, but mostly it’s just a fun, shambolic Lips song.

[READ: October 24, 2019] “Sredni Vashtar”

Just in time for Halloween, from the people who brought me The Short Story Advent Calendar and The Ghost Box. and Ghost Box II. comes Ghost Box III.

This is once again a nifty little box (with a magnetic opening and a ribbon) which contains 11 stories for Halloween.  It is lovingly described thusly:

Oh god, it’s right behind me, isn’t it? There’s no use trying to run from Ghost Box III, the terrifying conclusion to our series of limited-edition horror box sets edited and introduced by Patton Oswalt.

There is no explicit “order” to these books; however, I’m going to read in the order they were stacked.

This has been quite possibly my favorite story in any of the Ghost Boxes.

Saki is the pen name of British author Hector Hugh Munro.  I could not get over that this story was written in 1912, as it was timeless and darkly amusing.

The story is about Conradin, a ten year old boy.  Conradin was unwell and the doctor believed he had maybe five years left before he would be dead.  Conradin was cared for by Mrs. de Ropp, although “thwarting him ‘for his good’ was a duty which she did not find particularly irksome.”  Likewise, “Conradin hated her with a desperate sincerity which he was perfectly able to mask.”

Basically Conradin wanted to do things (like eat toast) but Mrs de Ropp was always there to prevent him form doing so.

The only freedom he had was in the dull cheerless garden.  Because there was a disused tool shed where Conradin would spend his time.

The tool shed was full of phantoms of Conradin’s own creation as well as two living creatures–a Houdan hen on which Conradin lavished affection and “a large polecat-ferret.”

Conradin was afraid of this creature, but he also loved it.  So much so that it became like a god to him.  He even spun the name Sredni Vashtar for this creature and said prayers to it whenever he felt the need.  The hen was never part of the worshiping–Conradin had decided that she was an Anabapstst “he did not pretended to have the remotest knowledge as to what an Anabaptist was, but he privately hoped that it was dashing and not very respectable.”

Mrs de Ropp did not like him spending so much time in the shed.  She inspected the shed and took away the Houdan hen and had it sold.  But this did not deter Conradin.  The only change for him was that instead of saying his prayers, he now asked for a request: “Do one thing for me, Sredni Vashtar.”

Finally Mrs de Ropp had had enough.  She returned to the shed with the intention of getting rid of everything in there.  Conradin continued his prayer.

The ending is hilarious and very satisfying.

Read Patton Oswalt’s take here.