I Just Read About That…

SOUNDTRACK: NEIL YOUNG-Trans (1982).

By most standards this Neil Young album is a disaster.  It’s so bad that despite updating his entire catalog and releasing all kinds of bootleg concerts, he has never issued this disc on CD in the States.  So, just what’s so awful about this disc?

Well, mostly it’s awful as a Neil Young disc.  Meaning, if you like Neil Young (either flavor: country/folk or hard rock/grunge) this disc is a big fat HUH??  Neil Young has gone all synthy?  And not just synth but computerized synthy–sometimes his voice is utterly like a computer.  It’s a travesty, it’s a shame, it’s an incredible surprise.  Unless you listen to it without thinking of it as a Neil Young record.

But after all that introduction, the biggest surprise is the first song.  You’ve been prepped for this weird album full of computer nonsense and you get the fairly standard (if a little dull) rockabilly type music of “A Little Thing Called Love.”  It’s a pretty standard Neil Young song for the time.  Hmm, maybe the album isn’t that weird.

Well, then comes “Computer Age” and the keyboards kick in.  Interestingly, to me anyhow, this is the year that Rush released Signals.  Signals was the album where Rush fans said Woah, what’s with the keyboards guys.  Similarly, “Computer Age” makes you say, geez, was there a sale on keyboards in Canada?  The keyboards are kind of thin and wheedly, but the real surprise comes in the processed vocals (Rush never went that far).  The vocals are basically the 1980s equivalent of auto-tune (no idea how they did this back then).  Because the song is all about the computer age it kind of makes sense that he would use this weird robotic voice.  Sometimes it’s the only voice, although he also uses the computer voice as a high-pitched harmony over his normal singing voice.

“We R in Control” sounds like it might be a heavy rocker (anemic production notwithstanding) until we get more computer vocals.  Again, conceptually it works (its all about the dominance of CCTV), but it is pretty weird as a Neil Young song.

And then comes yet another shock, “Transformer Man.”  Yes, THAT “Transformer Man,” except not.  This original version of the song is sung entirely in a processed super high pitched computer voice that is almost hard to understand).  The only “normal’ part of the song is the occasional chorus and the “do do do dos.”  It sounds like a weird cover.  Sarah, who loves Neil Young, practically ran out of the room when she heard this version.

“Computer Cowboy (aka Syscrusher)” continues in that same vein.  Musically it’s a bit more experimental (and the computer vocals are in a much lower register).  Although I think it’s probably the least interesting of these songs.

Just to confuse the listener further, “Hold On to Your Love” is a conventional poppy song–no computer anything (aside from occasional keyboard notes).  Then comes the 8 minute “Sample and Hold” the most computerized song of the bunch and one of the weirder, cooler songs on the disc.  It really feels like a complete song–all vocodered out with multiple layers of vocals, not thin and lacking substance like some of the tracks.  It opens with personal stats (hair: blonde, eyes: blue) and proceeds through a litany of repeated “new design, new design” motifs.

This is followed by a remake of “Mr Soul” previously only on Decade.  This is a new vocodered-harmonies version of the song.

The biggest failure of the disc to me is “Like an Inca” it’s nine minutes of virtually the same guitar riff.  The chorus is pretty wonderful, but it’s a very minor part of the song itself.  It is fairly traditional Neil song, I just wish it were much shorter.

So, this travesty of a disc is actually pretty interesting and, for me, pretty enjoyable.  Most of these synthy songs sound kind of weak but I think that has more to do with the production of the time. I’d love to hear newly recorded versions of these songs (with or without the vocoder) to see what he could do with a great production team behind him.

Trans is not a Neil Young disc in any conventional sense, but as an experiment, as a document of early 80s synth music, it not only holds up, it actually pushes a lot of envelopes.   I’m not saying he was trying to out Kraftwerk Kraftwerk or anything like that, but for a folk/rock singer to take chances like this was pretty admirable.  Shame everybody hated it.

[READ: July 5, 2011] Five Dials 19

Five Dials 19 is the Parenting Issue.  But rather than offering parenting advice, the writers simply talk about what it’s like to be a parent, or to have a parent.  It was one of the most enjoyable Five Dials issues I have read so far.

CRAIG TAYLOR & DIEDRE DOLAN-On Foreign Bureuas and Parenting Issues
I enjoyed Taylor’s introduction, in which he explains that he is not very useful for a parenting issue   That most of the duties will be taken on by Diedre Dolan in NYC.  They are currently in her house working while her daughter plays in the next room.  His ending comment was hilarious:

Also, as is traditional at most newsweeklies, someone just put a plastic tiara on my head and then ran away laughing at me.

I resist Parenting magazines, from Parents to Parenting to Fretful Mother, they all offer some sound advice but only after they offer heaps and heaps of guilt and impossible standards.  So I was delighted to see that Five Dials would take an approach to parenting that I fully approve of.  Dolan writes:

Nobody knows what works. Most people just make some choices and defend them for the next 18 to 50 years – claiming nurture (good manners) or nature (crippling shyness) when it suits them best.

And indeed, the magazine made me feel a lot better about my skills (or lack) as a parent.

KATHA POLLITT-On Daughters: Beautiful Screamer
I’ve loved Katha Pollitt for years.  Her columns in The Nation are uniformly fantastic.  She speaks up for women and is often funny while doing it.  And so to read that Pollitt’s observations about parenting magazine were similar to mine (only more well-thought-out and put together) was a joy.

What was amazing, too, was that these know-it-alls were not in the least disturbed by their disagreements, even when their opposing advice was placed side by side in magazine features with titles like ‘We Asked the Experts’ and‘You Wanted to Know.’  They just sailed on, blithely asserting their wisdom like political pundits. The important thing, after all, wasn’t to give the right answer.  It was to train parents to see child-raising as a set of technical problems they couldn’t solve on their own, and never to have the thought that perhaps the reason for the conflicting answers was that the questions weren’t all that important; whatever you decided probably wasn’t all right. The whole childcare-advice industry was about the production and soothing of anxiety

It felt like a justification of everything I believe (of course, for that matter, why should I trust her more than myself?).  This article is a small glimpse into Katha’a life.  She mentions ups and downs and is very generous with her realities.  It was a great read and is excerpted from her 2007 book Learning to Drive and Other Life Stories.

ALAIN DE BOTTON-A List: Parental Advisory
Rather than giving advice, in this issue De Botton gives Tweets.  Of course, his tweets are far more pithy and thoughtful than…well…let’s just say most tweets.

HEIDI JULAVITS-On Daughters: The Pain Machine
Julavits’ account of her own daughter was also useful for me to read.  Sometimes we worry that our kids are too into their material possessions, but then to read of a child who cares for no things at all (even sentimental things) makes me think we’re on the better end of the spectrum.  This was a much darker picture than Pollitt’s but that seems to be in keeping with Julavits’ writing style and content.

JOHN KENNEY-On Fathers: Finally Getting Around to Having That Talk About Sex with My Dad
This is a darkly comic story. I assume it is fiction, but maybe it’s just exaggerated fiction about a man trying to communicate with his elderly and possibly demented father.

SARAH MILLER-On Not Parenting: At Least We Don’t Brag
I appreciated that this issue on parenting also had an essay from a non-parent (I wonder how much I would have liked this issue ten years ago?).  Miller revealed her hatred for a phrase I’ve never uttered and I think never heard uttered, “Imagine if you had kids.”  As in, you think this experience is great but just imagine if you had kids to see it with you.  Pretty obnoxious.  The subtitle pretty well sums up her attitude about being a parent–at least we don’t brag to others.

CHRISTOPH NIEMANN-Still Life: On Groceries
Six pictures of what various people shop for and their home situations.

Roundtable: A Conversation with Kids on the Subject of Parenting
A conversation with five or six kids from NY about being a parent.  As these things tend to do, wonderful insights are provided.

ALEXANDRA STYRON-On Fathers: Life Requires Courage
Styron is William Styron’s daughter.  He seems like an unpleasant father.  Yet another example of how knowing a famous person isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.  This is an excerpt from her book Reading My Father.

HUGH GALLAGHER-Personals: Undecided
An over the top nonsensical online dating profile.  Amusing but too long even at less than half a page.

TUCKER NICHOLS-On the Necessities: Still Life
Several pictures from Nichols with the title: Objects I was unfamiliar with.  No names are given, but my favorite is the breast pump.

KEVIN BAKER-On Mothers: In the Witch City
Baker is spending time in Salem, Mass. This essay is split between talking about Salem (which I enjoyed) and caring for his demented mother (which (understandably) I didn’t enjoy).  The parts about Salem are a little dismissive of the fun industry that Salem has built around itself (which as a tourist I enjoyed, but I could see if you were there all the time, you’d get tired of all the “witchy” paraphernalia).  And his criticism of the foolish phrase “Life’s a Witch and then You Fly” is wholly justified.

And it is also hard to argue with his assertion about Salem culture:

the one small, gnawing fact of history, which is that …they weren’t witches. They weren’t witches at all, just twenty ageing women and men who were hanged and pressed to death under rocks.

The more heartbreaking second half of the story talks about his mother’s suffering from Huntington’s disease and just how devastating it can be for an adult.   Tough going!

DARIN STRAUSS-On Twins: Life Imitating Art
This is subtitled Eleven thoughts on raising twins.  I enjoyed Strauss’ memoir, Half a Life, quite a bit and he keeps that same tone of wonder and embarrassment throughout these tips.  I really enjoyed how he kept saying he didn’t want to sound sentimental, but how could you not?

LOUIS THEROUX-On Starting Late: A Liberation in Slavery
This is an interview with Louis Theroux, who I don’t know.  He talks about the unexpected excitement of raising two boys.

JIM WINDOLF-On Parents: ’75
This is an account of Windolf’s youth.  It opens with the his admiration of his father because of his father’s new car, a TR7.  But it quickly turns into a tale of jealously (from the boy) and awkwardness (from the father).  You see, Jim’s father works for John Reynold’s father.  John Reynolds is an inveterate exaggerator and pretty much a dick.  (He claims he kicked a field goal during half time at a football game during the Olympics).  Jim calls him on it and it turns into a fight.  When Jim tattles, his father and John’s father awkwardly laugh it off and basically tell them to work it out.

All of this fighting took place on the Reynold’s yacht, by the way.  On the way home, they stop for pizza, but through a (perceived?) slight, his parents fight and his mom takes off, with Jim in the car, leaving his father to walk home with the pizza.

Rather than the TR7, his mom is driving the family station wagon, an older boat of a car.  She takes this private time to confide in him about her past (while she pushes the wagon to nearly 100MPH).  She was a wild girl before she met his father (and other things Jim really doesn’t want to hear).

When they get home, Jim talks to his dad (who is waiting in the kitchen with cold pizza).  He tells him about what happened (even though he doesn’t want to), and this private moment gives the men a chance to “bond.”  It also leads, a few days later to his father pushing 100 MPH in the TR7.  It’s a depressing story of parents trying to impress their son with foolish behavior.

WILLIAM BERLIND-On New Arrivals: Our Little Man
This story totally had me fooled.  It was wonderful.  Hearing Berlind’s utter disdain for their new arrival is shocking…shocking that a man could be so jealous.  But then you start to think that maybe he’s right a little bit.  And then he pulls the rug out from under you.  Great storytelling.

PIERS PAUL READ-On Children: Losing Their Religion
This is a look at the place of religion in upbringing children.  And how you can try to influence their religious choices, but it’s never clear if you have anything to do with their beliefs.

PETER MEHLMAN-On Bad Parents: Raising Moderately Healthy Jerks
This is an enjoyable essay about how there is no greater sin than being a bad parent.  The latest example would be that Martin Sheen must have been a bad father.  This leads to this truism

The fascinating outgrowth of all this is that there is now an ever-widening, bazillion-dollar growth industry devoted to making bad parenting almost impossible.

This of course all ends with his saying simply that some parents are not good at the job, and they shouldn’t be blamed for it.

ARTHUR BRADFORD-On Alternative Parenting: Raise Them Up Hippy
Bradford relates his own upbringing in a radically hippie manner (a school where nude swimming in a lake was the norm); a home where his divorced mom invited all of her women friends to live (in rural Maine) where they split wood and ate placenta.  But the crux of the essay comes to this

Why didn’t those of us who grew up with such outlandish examples of creativity end up better than the previous generations? Why aren’t we all creative geniuses, super-free beings, with little happy earth children? Or maybe we should have all ended up helpless, or in jail? Certainly many of our grandparents shook their heads and figured we were a lost cause. But really, we’re just middle of the road, some good, some bad, not really any more enlightened than any of the parents before us, if we’re being honest. Does it really matter what you expose your kid to anyway?

Bradford is a fun writer.  He has gone on to do many interesting things. I’m planning to read more of his works in the near future.  (Those following my blog will note that I have already read many other things from Bradford.  This post was created many many moons ago, but was scheduled for this particular Saturday to keep it in order).

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From the entire issue I took away a healthy message–stop beating yourself up if your child isn’t perfect all the time.  Why do we have to torture ourselves to make sure our children are angels, when it seem like providing a good moral compass is the best we can do.  I look at my kids; my son and daughter are radically different.  Sometimes they love each other, sometimes they hate each other, and it’s not like we did anything very different for either one of them. I think perhaps the best lesson is that a relaxed and happy parent makes for a relaxed and happy household.  I’ll keep that in mind next time he says “I’ll kill you if you don’t give me my toy back.”

After the somewhat disappointing issues 17 and 18, Number 19 was simply fantastic.