I Just Read About That…

SOUNDTRACK:

[READ: December 13, 2023] “Hamburger Baby”

This year my wife ordered me The Short Story Advent Calendar.  This is my sixth time reading the Calendar–it’s a holiday tradition!  Here’s what H&O says about the calendar this year.

The 2023 Short Story Advent Calendar is a deluxe box set of individual short stories from some of the best writers in North America and beyond.  Now in its ninth year, the SSAC is back to once again bring readers a deluxe, peppermint-fresh collection of 25 short stories from some of the best writers in North America and beyond.

The author of this story was Melissa Broder.  Each day has an online component with the author with a brief interview.

It’s December 13. Melissa Broder, author of Death Valley, considers the DockATot.

This is one of those weird stories that is built on a bizarre premise and follows itself to a logical conclusion.  Even if it is all patently absurd.

Broder explains the story a little:

MB: “Hamburger Baby” was inspired by the birth of my sister’s human baby, as well as my relationship with my mother. I knew nothing about babies or baby accoutrement before my sister’s baby was born, and I was astounded by the range of consumer options for an infant. It was fun to do a send-up of that.

And that send up goes beyond simple consumer products.

The narrator, who is a little dopey, gives birth to a healthy hamburger.  But it’s not a walking/talking/baby surrogate hamburger, it’s an actual hamburger.

She is embarrassed of course and they are afraid to tell anyone.  But she has to because everyone knew she was pregnant and since people didn’t know what to said they made it about themselves.  I enjoyed very much this exchange between the narrator and her friend Michelle:

I had postpartum when Quinn was born ….  I felt more like his babysitter than his mother.
You have a baby, Michelle, I said, I have a hamburger.
In a way that maybe makes it worse for me, she said.

A situation like this brings a couple closer together or forces them apart. Soon enough her husband was saying it was either the hamburger or him.

By the end of the story, the narrator has found a support group, even though the hamburger is largely disintegrated at this point.