I Just Read About That…

SOUNDTRACK: THE APPLES IN STEREO-King of Carrot Flowers, Pt. 3 from Score! 20 Years of Merge Records: The Covers (2009).

The Apples in Stereo have made the first song on this covers disc in which I categorically like the original better.  I don’t know that much about the Apples in Stereo, although I know they are tangentially related to Neutral Milk Hotel.  But I don’t know if their style is in general like this version–keyboardy and simplistic, or if this is a goof project for them.

Of course, the original of this song, by Neutral Milk Hotel is an indie classic, so you’d be hard pressed to try to do a respectful version and make it sound better.  It’s nice they did something different, I just don’t like it as much.

[READ: April 6, 2012] “The Porn Critic”

This is a story that is superficially facile–it confirms the age-old belief that women just do not like porn.  And yet there’s some interesting dynamics at work that I found really enjoyable.

The story is about Kromer.  Kromer was believed to be a hedonistic satyr–that a life of partying, drugs and sex followed him wherever he went.  But that was not exactly true–he was around a lot of it, just never in the middle of it.  The debauchery in his life was all thanks to his friend Greta.

Greta has a trust fund that will not mature until she reaches 30.  She was so outraged at not having the trust fund that (and I love this phrasing) it “drove her mad with the determination to die squalorously before she became wealthy.”  Despite her lack of access to the fund, she did have at her disposal  her father’s “man.”  He would cater to her every whim at any hour of the day.

And so she lived the hedonistic lifestyle–drugs and drinking, closing out parties and hanging with wild transsexuals (and calling for deliveries from delis across town to the bar she was currently in).  And she also hung out with Kromer–who was terrified of her debauched friends, but loved the access to her father’s servant.

Kromer’s reputation was also helped because he worked in a porn shop called Sex Machines.  He worked for a local real estate maven who owned all kinds of stores–from coffee to video to adult marital aids.  I love the details of Sex Machines, and that its “interior and stock had been painstakingly derived from that of a famous San Francisco shop, founded by a sex-positive lesbian collective. In lieu of such a collective, the owner had installed Kromer,”  So instead of Toys in Babeland Manhattan got Sex Machine.

Sex Machine also published a newsletter which included reviews of the latest porn movies.  And Kromer was the sole reviewer–he watches dozens of films (the output is tremendous!) and tried to simplify their content for the clientele.

As a result, he had tons of porn movies lying around his house.  And as a result of that, very few people, women especially, had visited his apartment.

The plot of the story revolves around a woman who Kromer really likes.  Here name is Renee (Beautiful Renee).  She is also inseparable from her friend Luna (Invisible Luna)–and neither has ever been alone with Kromer.  It was their bolder friend Sarah who told Kromer that they weren’t afraid of him, more like dizzily repulsed.  He wanted to ask Sarah about Renee, but was afraid that Sarah might be interested in him, and he didn’t want to lose that option either!

Then one night, with Greta’s help, he is able to get some alone time with Renee.  They four of them walk to Kromer’s apartment–Greta and Luna talking about drugs and Kromer, awkwardly talking to Renee about…her.

And when they get to his apartment, the den of porn, the mood changes dramatically.  Renee, who has earlier expressed feminist leanings, is appalled by what she sees–she’s actually nauseated by it.  Greta is of course enjoying every moment and tries to make things more hedonistic for all.

The story ends in a debauched haze, with a few surprises, a wonderful call back to an earlier moment and a general sense of disappointment.  It was really enjoyable.

I was also impressed at how a story that was so resolutely about pornography refrained from using any curse words (until the very end, when it felt like the while scene just got away from Kromer).